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Author Topic: New to Flame-Keeping.  (Read 9447 times)
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« Topic Start: January 22, 2010, 02:56:50 pm »

I was wondering if I could just ask the group a little about the experience of flame-keeping. I'm new to TC and have almost no experience in online forums of this kind, so I feel a bit unsure about posting a question, in case there are conversations in the archives (or whatever?) that have already answered it. If there are, please do direct me to them!

I know the basic idea of lighting the candle at sunset and "keeping" the flame either literally or symbolically for twenty-four hours, spending that time meditating on and strengthening your relationship with Brigid. I wanted to get involved because, for about a year now, Brigid has slowly been working Her way into my life and now I feel compelled to commit to some kind of formal practice in acknowledgement of this relationship. Unlike most of my spiritual practices, which are usually creative meditations and simple rituals, I actually feel nervous about this one, like I'm stepping into something very powerful and potentially life-transforming and I want to take that commitment seriously.

So on that note, I would really love to hear about others' experiences with flame-keeping and also with working with Brigid more generally. I guess what I'm basically asking is for a hint on what to expect: what kinds of practices others have tried, what flame-keeping is like and what purpose people understand it to be serving, if different cill groups result in different flame-keeping experiences, etc. Thanks so much for bearing with me and my newbie questions! Smiley

--Ali
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« Reply #1: January 22, 2010, 07:30:10 pm »

I know the basic idea of lighting the candle at sunset and "keeping" the flame either literally or symbolically for twenty-four hours, spending that time meditating on and strengthening your relationship with Brigid. I wanted to get involved because, for about a year now, Brigid has slowly been working Her way into my life and now I feel compelled to commit to some kind of formal practice in acknowledgement of this relationship. Unlike most of my spiritual practices, which are usually creative meditations and simple rituals, I actually feel nervous about this one, like I'm stepping into something very powerful and potentially life-transforming and I want to take that commitment seriously.

First of all, Ali, I'm really glad to see you here! I've been reading your blog for a while and I love it.   Smiley

I think there's a lot of great stuff about a lot of people's experiences with Brighid right here in the Cill SIG.

Like these:
Shift Experiences
The Nature of Brighid
Being a Flamekeeper/FlameTender
Wondering what people do on shifts

However, don't let that deter you from starting new threads, especially since this topic hasn't come up in a long time. I actually rather like when old threads like these get re-introduced into the discussion. I can go back and reread them and find a lot of insights.

There are also several threads about Brighid in some of the other folders, but those might take a little more digging for me to turn up for you.


Second, I find it interesting about what you said about how Brighid worked her way into your life. Brighid seems to sort of sneak into so many lives without a great deal of fanfare. Several of us here, myself included, came to know Brighid very quietly and gently. Finally recognizing her was really like suddenly remembering the name of an old friend. I also find it interesting how she lets us take our time in deciding to devote ourselves to her. Again, a lot of us only "formally" acknowledged Brighid after a year or so, and even then, the devotion was not so much a formal rite of dedication, but rather a quite realization of how much she has already been with you.

So I wouldn't be nervous about Flamekeeping. I think it is definitely a commitment that is life-changing and transformative, but it's not like the sudden transformation and illumination of lightning. It's like the sun rising and slowly revealing what was waiting to be seen.  Smiley
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« Reply #2: January 22, 2010, 09:12:06 pm »

Second, I find it interesting about what you said about how Brighid worked her way into your life. Brighid seems to sort of sneak into so many lives without a great deal of fanfare. Several of us here, myself included, came to know Brighid very quietly and gently. Finally recognizing her was really like suddenly remembering the name of an old friend. I also find it interesting how she lets us take our time in deciding to devote ourselves to her. Again, a lot of us only "formally" acknowledged Brighid after a year or so, and even then, the devotion was not so much a formal rite of dedication, but rather a quite realization of how much she has already been with you.

Welcome to the Cill!

I agree with Finn about this (and a lot of other things, too, of course  Cheesy ).  Brighid definitely entered my life gently and over a long period of time.  She was with me well before I understood that.  There's a thread in TC somewhere about dedicating to god/goddesses.  I can't remember if I started it or just posted in in, but I did talk about my experience with wanting to do a formal dedication to Brighid, and then realizing that it was totally unnecessary because I was already dedicated.  (I can find that thread if you want me to.)

My experiences with keeping the flame have varied widely over the years.  I'm a member of this Cill and two others (through Ord Brighideach), so I have 3 "official" shifts, but I light my lamp EVERY night without fail.  On my shift nights, I do other things in addition to keep my aware.  Sometimes that involves my activities for the evening/day (like reading about Brighid or whatever), sometimes it involves wearing a specific piece of jewelry, sometimes other things.

I've had some very powerful experiences during shifts, especially using a meditation technique called Active Imagination (again, I've posted about this in other threads).  Other shifts are quieter.

All in all, though, I love being part of the Cill because it keeps me both mindful and grounded.

As for the commitment aspect, yes, it can be life-changing.  But, really, I think committing to tending the flame is different from dedicating yourself to Brighid.  You can tend for a while, then thank Brighid for the experience and move on.  But when you dedicate yourself, that's for good -- or should be.  More like committing to a marriage.

As Finn said, there are lots of good threads, but we all love to talk about Brighid and about tending, so please feel free to post questions.   Cheesy
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« Reply #3: January 24, 2010, 09:04:19 pm »

Second, I find it interesting about what you said about how Brighid worked her way into your life. Brighid seems to sort of sneak into so many lives without a great deal of fanfare. ...
...
I agree with Finn about this (and a lot of other things, too, of course  Cheesy ).  Brighid definitely entered my life gently and over a long period of time.  She was with me well before I understood that.  ...

Thank you both for responding! (And Finn, I'm so glad you enjoy reading the blog--it's always so cool to discover readers in the unlikeliest places, and to follow the web-strands of the vast Pagan online community all over the etherial internet. Wink)

I find myself rather bemused by Brigid, honestly, because for at least two or three years now, I have been struggling (sometimes overtly, and sometimes just subconsciously) with polytheism, its various forms and theologies and their implications. I had at some point in college realized I no longer believed in the monotheistic, omnipotent God that most people I knew took for granted, and I had some vague sense that being merely pan(en)theistic wasn't personal enough for me on some psychological level (though it's a view that I very much admire and respect). But then, I couldn't just will myself to believe in other gods and goddesses, no matter how interesting I found the mythologies to be. And, anyway, I always had this impression that worshipping Brigid was just So Stereotypically Celtic-Pagan, and in some ways reading and hearing others talk about Her always felt like celebrity gossip, somehow.

But at the beginning of February last year, I had some break-through in how I thought about what it meant to "believe in" polytheistic deities more generally, and though I can't actually remember now what that break-through was, it seemed to be doing its silent, stealthy work in me all year long... During the summer, while doing completely unrelated research into Celtic mythology, I started noticing something odd. When I read accounts of Brigid in various texts, I sometimes caught myself thinking, "O, well, that's not what She's like at all!" It wasn't that suddenly I believed what I'd been reading, but like something (or Someone) else was stepping in and nudging me, getting me to pay more attention and give more credance to my innate sense of who and what Brigid was, as I experienced Her. In the past month, suddenly She seems to be everywhere, and aspects of Her seem to be pushing themselves forward in unexpected ways.... And I find that She's much bigger than I realized, no longer an interesting story, but... real.

So here I am, with the urge to be embarrassingly enthusiastic and vocal about it, and plunge myself right into out-and-out worship. Strange! I just want to make sure this is a commitment I am willing to make and uphold, which is where I think the nerves are coming from. I had a talk with my partner's daughter the other night, as I was working on some small clay sculptures of flames and spirals (playing with some ritual object I can use as a symbolic flame when I can't have the literal fire lit). She kept asking me what I was doing and why, and I explained about keeping the flame as a commitment to Brigid, honoring her and making space in my life to welcome her and express my gratitude. I explained how it was important to keep a regular vigil as an expression of the importance of the relationship, even if sometimes it was inconvenient or difficult (like when you've got a cold and are sick in bed, as I was the past two days). Her responses (such as "well, if you're going to get sick, you shouldn't sign up to do it, then, right?") remind me of just why formal commitment is necessary to me at this point, I think. It's so easy to make excuses for why you're not good enough or disciplined enough to step up to the plate and take on that responsibility, how others will do it better than you could, how you just don't have the time right now, or the space and means to do it properly.... But if you get all those excuses out of the way and do it anyway, then that really says something about your willingness to be present, regardless of circumstance. So that Brigid isn't just a hobby or a fair-weather friend... she's your Goddess-Capital-B.

But now I'm rambling! Obviously it's time for me to go back to bed and get some more cough medicine in me before I get downright delusional. Wink
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« Reply #4: January 24, 2010, 10:43:47 pm »


Ali,

I don't really have a specific response to your post.  I just wanted to tell you that I appreciate you taking the time to write it.  Your writing is very insightful, and apparently what I need to be reading right now.   Cheesy

Thanks.

~MI
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« Reply #5: January 25, 2010, 06:25:11 am »

Ali,

I don't really have a specific response to your post.  I just wanted to tell you that I appreciate you taking the time to write it.  Your writing is very insightful, and apparently what I need to be reading right now.   Cheesy

Thanks.

~MI

I'd like to ditto Moon Ivy here -- what you said is exactly what I need to see right now, Ali. Thank you for writing it. Smiley
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« Reply #6: January 25, 2010, 08:43:23 am »

So on that note, I would really love to hear about others' experiences with flame-keeping and also with working with Brigid more generally.

As much as a bitchy task-master as She can be with my writing projects, She's always been rather gentle with me with regards to Cill shifts. Sometimes I'm so worn out all I can do is light a candle for an hour or wear my Brigit's Cross pendant to work, and I never get reprimanded for it. I always want to do more for my shift, but mundane concerns often get in the way with a depressing frequency.

One thing I'll pass along... I bought an LED tealight to put on my desk at work when I'm on shift. They are also great for use at home if you want to have flame but can't keep a real candle lit for some reason, like overnight on an altar. They're pretty energy efficient... I haven't had to change one of the batteries yet, and I've had mine for a couple years now.

Karen
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« Reply #7: January 25, 2010, 10:36:04 am »

So that Brigid isn't just a hobby or a fair-weather friend... she's your Goddess-Capital-B.

This. YES.
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« Reply #8: January 25, 2010, 11:21:24 am »

But if you get all those excuses out of the way and do it anyway

This is the part I'm working on right now, along with really just getting to know my Many better. It is really hard!
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« Reply #9: January 25, 2010, 02:09:13 pm »

...
But if you get all those excuses out of the way and do it anyway, then that really says something about your willingness to be present, regardless of circumstance. So that Brigid isn't just a hobby or a fair-weather friend... she's your Goddess-Capital-B.

*dingdingding*  Give the little gal a Cupie Doll!  You nailed it.

I keep Her flame every day of my life, whether I light a candle, tend the hearth fire or keep the virtual flame in my heart going. 

I *could* blow it off, ignore my duties and let a day slide to illness, but with me, that could be every single day of my life.

The Cill is an external reminder of what I already know.  If I tend that flame properly, I can share it.  I can let it be a light in the lives of those around me.  I can be a part of that light.  No matter what else is going on in my life, no matter how deeply depressed I get over bills I cannot pay, or the disability that prevents me from doing the things I used to do, I can do this.  I can keep the sacred flame burning, and I can shed that light out from myself.

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« Reply #10: January 25, 2010, 07:28:14 pm »

I keep Her flame every day of my life, whether I light a candle, tend the hearth fire or keep the virtual flame in my heart going. 

I *could* blow it off, ignore my duties and let a day slide to illness, but with me, that could be every single day of my life.

The Cill is an external reminder of what I already know.  If I tend that flame properly, I can share it.  I can let it be a light in the lives of those around me.  I can be a part of that light.  No matter what else is going on in my life, no matter how deeply depressed I get over bills I cannot pay, or the disability that prevents me from doing the things I used to do, I can do this.  I can keep the sacred flame burning, and I can shed that light out from myself.

YES.

Every day of my life is a "Cill shift".  While I do keep an LED candle on at all times, and I do light my oil lamp every night, and I do have specific things I do during shifts, it's really about staying mindful and aware of Her all the time.  Making a deliberate effort to let Her in.  Knowing that I *am* Her lantern, Her harp.

I'd like to add more to this.  But I think you've summed it up very well, Matrinka.  Thanks.
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« Reply #11: January 25, 2010, 08:03:21 pm »

YES.

Every day of my life is a "Cill shift".  While I do keep an LED candle on at all times, and I do light my oil lamp every night, and I do have specific things I do during shifts, it's really about staying mindful and aware of Her all the time.  Making a deliberate effort to let Her in.  Knowing that I *am* Her lantern, Her harp.

I'd like to add more to this.  But I think you've summed it up very well, Matrinka.  Thanks.


Smiley 
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« Reply #12: January 27, 2010, 12:13:09 pm »

So on that note, I would really love to hear about others' experiences with flame-keeping and also with working with Brigid more generally.

I met Brighid at a public Imbolc ritual, and did ritual honoring Her after that at least once. I felt drawn to the idea of Flamekeeping and the Cauldron Cill, but took me a little bit to join. Since then, I've gotten to know Her much better.

Some people experience Her as possessive - I haven't so much. In fact, I often end up honoring other gods as well as Her during my shifts.

Sometimes my shifts for Her seem to have themes. Sometimes I'll do some sort of creative work - jewelry and writing are pretty common. I generally try to stay aware of Her during the shift. I have specific jewelry I wear during shifts. When I'm at work during a shift, I put a plush hedgehog on the info desk. Smiley

It is an important commitment, although it's not the same as a dedication. (Unless, between you and Her, it is.) I've occasionally forgotten my shifts, and then realized later I was doing shift work. She's been fairly patient with me. Sometimes I've had a hard time connecting, but it's gotten better lately.
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« Reply #13: January 27, 2010, 03:04:26 pm »

I met Brighid at a public Imbolc ritual, and did ritual honoring Her after that at least once. I felt drawn to the idea of Flamekeeping and the Cauldron Cill, but took me a little bit to join. Since then, I've gotten to know Her much better.

That's really interesting, Garnet! I haven't had very much experience with public/group ritual, in part because I was always hesitant to participate in a ritual dedicated to a god or goddess that I didn't really have a relationship with (or maybe didn't even know if I believed in)--I felt like somehow it was insincere or disrespectful. So as a result, most group rituals I've attended have been very open and tended towards the generic, while my private rituals focused more on symbolism of the land, the three elements/realms and those types of things. It makes me wonder, though, how many people have been "introduced" to a god or goddess through public ritual (and if I was missing out on something Wink).

Funnily enough, Imbolc as a holiday has always been kind of a big deal for me, since it was the first holy day I celebrated formally as a practicing Pagan and the one on which I finally committed formally to that path as a personal spiritual journey, and not merely as academic research (which I'd been doing for my thesis work up until then). I always loved the symbolism of fire and water commingling, that dance of hot and cool, and I've been writing poetry forever... So in some ways, it seems like I was destined to come around to Brigid eventually! Wonder what took so long. Wink

--Ali

P.S. Love the hedgehog! What a great idea! Smiley
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« Reply #14: January 27, 2010, 04:44:22 pm »

It makes me wonder, though, how many people have been "introduced" to a god or goddess through public ritual (and if I was missing out on something Wink).

Public ritual can be a mixed bag, depending on the group. I definitely wasn't the only one who was introduced to Brighid at the ritual. On the other hand, that ritual became somewhat infamous due to someone changing a baby during the trance and our donation money being stolen.

I like what Matrinka said in another thread about Imbolc - that it's okay to have some deities you only honor occasionally, like the family members you only see once or twice a year, on special occasions. I have Those I'm devoted to, and sometimes I'll say "hi" occasionally to other members of the pantheons. Sometimes these have developed into closer relationships. I think if it's okay with the deity and you do it respectfully, it can be alright. It helps to get to know the deity ahead of time before the ritual, *especially* if you're the one running it.

Quote
Funnily enough, Imbolc as a holiday has always been kind of a big deal for me, since it was the first holy day I celebrated formally as a practicing Pagan and the one on which I finally committed formally to that path as a personal spiritual journey, and not merely as academic research (which I'd been doing for my thesis work up until then).

I love Imbolc myself, too. I've got some cool personal anniversaries related to me coming to magic and meeting the first group I worked with (and still work with) around that time. It always feels like things are waking up to me. Getting to know Brighid, of course, has made it even niftier.

Quote
P.S. Love the hedgehog! What a great idea! Smiley

Thanks! I got the hedgehog symbolism from the Brighid chapter in Devoted to You, which is one of two from a recon point of view.

If you crochet, here's a cute little one (pattern at end of article):
http://warmfuzzies.typepad.com/warmfuzzies/2006/10/sammy_the_hedge.html

I'm planning to make this myself at some point.
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