Honestly, the beginning drags SO MUCH it's really hard to care about the characters. We spend how much time on a hawk that's not even involved in the story?
I gave up halfway through the first chunk - I'm sorry, it just couldn't hold my attention AT ALL. There's just nothing going on. The biggest *conflict* is that the one woman spends too much time awake at night frog hunting.
Also, I think the main characters' relationship needs to be explicit - are they good friends, or are they romantic partners? It feels like you're trying to hint at romance without saying it - and seriously, if I don't even know the relationship between the two main characters who are clearly LIVING TOGETHER .....
I don't know what's going on, and there's nothing drawing me in enough to care. I really think you started at the wrong point. Completely.
I really wish I had some positive things to say here, but it really just didn't hold my interest. I'm sorry.