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Author Topic: Sharing Authority... long  (Read 3767 times)
Adept Member
Last Login:June 03, 2011, 01:52:13 am
United States United States

Religion: ergghhhmmmmnnnnn....
Posts: 1997

Did the big meanies break yer speshulness

Blog entries (48)

« Reply #5: May 17, 2010, 01:08:30 pm »

I feel for you.  My ex would ignore the kids and then get annoyed at something and lower the boom much harder than needed - which led to me changing what he decreed all the time.  After we split he had the balls to drop them back at my house on a number of occasions and tell me they were grounded - always for some bs thing.  I refused to follow his rules in my house, but in my house things were calm and everything went smoothly.  His was chaos.

I would sit him down and make it clear that there have to be rules, and that he has to follow them too.  No exceptions.  And call him on it every time he breaks the rules.  This will piss him off, but unless you want to live with chaos, it is necessary.

Hubbs is a child of this kind of parenting.  Mom and dad worked outside the home, gramma was the adult in charge and her form of discipline was "wait till your dad gets home" and dad was heavy handed in discipline.

Everything was all good right up until it wasn't.  No discipline, no discipline, no discipline, abuse.  So he's got an association that discipline equals abuse, anger, and resentment.

I'm gonna tell my son to join a circus so that death is cheap
And games are just another way of life
And I'm gonna tell my son to be a prophet of mistakes
Because for every truth there are half a million lies
And I'm gonna lock my son up in a tower
Till he learns to let his hair down far enough to climb outside.
-LIz Pahir

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