Help! The Porn Bot is trying to take off my pants!

The Cauldron's server is expensive and requires monthly payments. Please become a Bronze, Silver or Gold Donor if you can. Donations are needed every month. Without member support, we can't afford the server.

Or donate directly via Paypal

This message board is The Cauldron: A Pagan Forum's SMF Archive Board. It is closed to new memberships and to posting, but there are over 250,000 messages here that you can still search and read -- many full of interesting and useful information. (This board was open from February 2007 through June 2011).

Our new vBulletin discussion board is located at http://www.ecauldron.com/forum/ -- if you would like to participate in discussions like those you see here, please visit our new vBulletin message board, register an account and join in our discussions. We hope you will find the information in this message archive useful and will consider joining us on our new board.

[erinnightwalker]

So this girl adds me as a yahoo contact. I think nothing of it until she actually IM's me. Well, technically its not her, just the bot she runs to get clients. I figured some people here would appreciate it. Update- Apparently there is no person, only teh bot. Oh well, its funny anyway. Just so you know, Me is me ^_^

Some links were changed to protect the skanky.

kelsipanakos is Available - http://tinyurl.com/SpamsSpace
kelsipanakos :

sick of boys looking for a real man
Me:

Can't help you here, I have a vagina not a penis
kelsipanakos :

Hello there.. My name is Gina.. Got ur ID through Yahoo Directory
Me:

Hi
kelsipanakos :

I love chatting with new people.. Would you like to chat today? Where are you from?
Me:

hmmm.... judging from the website your tinyurl goes to, I'm assuming you do some sort of teast-show? I apologize if I am incorrect
kelsipanakos :

Nice Im 24 years old i'm going to school in California.. Can i ask you a question?
Me:

I think this is a bot program....
kelsipanakos :

Do you like big booty girls with big tits? lol seriously cuz thats what i am/have..Is that too much for you to handle?
Me:

hetero chick here, i have my own thanks
kelsipanakos :

so yea i'm lonely would you like to have some kinky fun? Would you like to see me?
Me:

I will anally rape your dog
kelsipanakos :

ok but i have no pictures on my computer.. but i have a video camera connected
Me:

and your cat
kelsipanakos :

ok let me set up my camera for you baby i hope your ready for some booty shots..
Me:

and quite possibly your goldfish
kelsipanakos :

lol ok goto http://tinyurl.com/SpamsSpace and we can go 1 on 1 chat. Just click join at the top of the webpage.
Me:

Never! Never I say!
kelsipanakos :

Don't worry baby its free to join this site all you have to do is register
Me:

I hope you get cyber AIDS
kelsipanakos :

fill out your cc info baby for Age verification ONLY, your card will not be charged.. ok i'm ready for u now
Me:

and cyber syphilis
kelsipanakos :

What color Panties do you think i should wear? i might have you favorite color here somewhere...
Me:

aaaaaaand a big helping of kilobyte krabs
kelsipanakos :

I'll do anything you want me to do.. Do you see me? I can't chat with you on the site till you register
Me:

Why on earth would I want to see you? O.o Unless you happen to be Johnny Depp, in which case you better dress up
kelsipanakos :

Baby I'm So Horny right now! Do Whatever You have to, to get in! i'll spank my ass till its red for u!!!
Me:

Ye gods, this bot is a red-assed baboon!
kelsipanakos :

I have another site you can try to get in... Its http://shortlinks.co.uk/SPAAAAAAAMPOOOOORN just click the accept button on the page baby! before time runs out
Me:

That's a cute webcam. I'm surprised it doesn't double as a dildo
kelsipanakos :

Hurry baby I can only give out one of those links per Day. My Boss doesn't like me doing to many free shows...
Me:

Boss? You mean you are doing this for profit? O.O And you look like THAT?!
kelsipanakos :

Your such a good boy, i'm gonna show you what good boys deserve.. i'll be waiting for you on the site...
Me:

You seem to be ignoring my complete lack of a penis. *checks crotch* Yep, still no external giblets
kelsipanakos :

k
Me:

Oh, do I have a real person now? or did the bot program run out?
kelsipanakos :

http://tinyurl.com/SpamsSpace
Me:

nerf?

[Melamphoros]

kelsipanakos is Available - http://tinyurl.com/SpamsSpace

While I do like your post and appreciate it (especially after the day I had).....those are not the ACTUAL links, are they?  'Cause I'm afraid to click them and see for myself.

[erinnightwalker]

While I do like your post and appreciate it (especially after the day I had).....those are not the ACTUAL links, are they?  'Cause I'm afraid to click them and see for myself.

The spamssapace one directs to a WTF screen, and the other goes to trains, I think. Should be safe for work, home, and goldfish. 

[Melamphoros]

The spamssapace one directs to a WTF screen, and the other goes to trains, I think. Should be safe for work, home, and goldfish. 

Oh yes, you must always think about the goldfish and their anal chastity

[erinnightwalker]

Oh yes, you must always think about the goldfish and their anal chastity

Why mommy? Why did they touch the bad places?

[Ellen M.]

Oh yes, you must always think about the goldfish and their anal chastity

God, if this forum ever needed a fundraiser, all you'd have to do is print a bunch of random comments (like the one quoted), stick them on t-shirts, and prepare to be rich.

[erinnightwalker]

God, if this forum ever needed a fundraiser, all you'd have to do is print a bunch of random comments (like the one quoted), stick them on t-shirts, and prepare to be rich.

I have a T-shirt idea that only needs a picture of the venus of Willendorf >.>

[Rowanfox]

Why mommy? Why did they touch the bad places?

Ya know, you'd think after reading the pagan advice thread I'd know better than to read with a mouth full of water........

[erinnightwalker]

Ya know, you'd think after reading the pagan advice thread I'd know better than to read with a mouth full of water........

Finally! I have made someone do that! *does the victory dance* 

[Morag]

Hah! Awesome. 

[Taliesin]

LOL KILOBYTE KRABS. I really should know better than to drink while reading.

[Dark Midnight]

LOL KILOBYTE KRABS. I really should know better than to drink while reading.

You really should by now!

[Serpent]

Why mommy? Why did they touch the bad places?

Ow, my diaphram...laughing...too hard.

[erinnightwalker]

Ow, my diaphram...laughing...too hard.

  *whistles innocently*

[LadyVagabond]

I hope you get cyber AIDS

Cyber Gonoherpesyphilaids!

[Tags:]

Jump to: Please select a destination: ----------------------------- About The Cauldron ----------------------------- => Rules and Regulations => Cauldron Announcements ===> Volunteers Needed: Site Assistants and Projects => Introductions => Board Questions, Suggestions, and Feedback => Chat and CauldronMUX Support => Test Board ----------------------------- Religion and Philosophy ----------------------------- => Paganism For Beginners => Books and Other Resources => Pagan Religions => Pagan Spirituality => Gods, Goddesses, and Mythology => Worship and Ritual => Holidays and Festivals => History and Religion => Faith in Everyday Life => Philosophy and Metaphysics => Non-Pagan Religions and Interfaith Discussions => Miscellaneous Religious Discussions ----------------------------- Magic and the Occult ----------------------------- => Magic and the Occult for Beginners => Witchcraft, Hoodoo, and Folk Magic => The Western Magical Tradition => Chaos Magic => Lodges and Other Magic Organizations => Miscellaneous Magical Discussions ----------------------------- Special Interest Groups & Special Discussions ----------------------------- => Special Topic Discussions => Chavi Memorial Chronic Illness SIG => General SIGS ===> College Pagans SIG ===> Cooking SIG ===> Divination SIG ===> Home and Garden SIG ===> Pagan Parents SIG ===> Teen Pagans SIG => Religious SIGS ===> Asatru and Heathenry SIG ===> Cauldron Cill ===> FlameKeeping SIG ===> Hazel and Oak: A Celtic Polytheism SIG ===> Neo-Druidry SIG ===> Reformed Kemeticism SIG ===> Ta Hiera Hellenic Polytheism SIG => Book/Media Discussion Boards ===> Academic Book Discussions ===> Pagan Religion Book Discussions ===> Magick Book Discussions ===> Fiction Book Discussions ===> DVD/Video Discussions ----------------------------- Life, the Universe, and Everything Else ----------------------------- => Pagan Announcements => Prayer and Energy Requests => News and Politics ===> Religious News ===> Non-Religious News ===> Political Discussions => Social Discussion Boards ===> Art, Poetry and Writing ===> Books ===> Computers and the Internet ===> Crafts and Hobbies ===> Family Life ===> Gaming ===> Health and Medicine ===> Humor and Quizzes ===> Music, Television, and Film ===> Pets ===> Science and Technology ===> Sports and Recreation