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Author Topic: Your thoughts on death?  (Read 3222 times)
Audrey
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« Topic Start: August 21, 2010, 05:29:00 pm »

Firstly, sorry if this in the wrong place, I was not sure where to put it so I guessed.

I have always been very familiar with death, so familiar that I do not differentiate so much between the dead and the living worlds.  I think it is all very connected.  I have had a lot of death experience sort of.  I have been speaking with the dead for as long as I can remember, and I have guided people over a few times before.  I have also lost people I love very much and that always feels so different from the other experiences.  I have a hard time seeing through the grief.  I just sort of felt that I had conceptually come to understand death. 

Now however things have changed.  One of my best friends will be beyond the breath in 6 months time.  I just found out today although I sensed it last night sort of.  Now everything I thought I new is in tatters.  I know I should not simply abandon all I have learned due to grief but as I said I have a very hard time seeing anything past my sorrow. 

What I could use is some different perspectives on death and what comes after.  I have always had my own sort of beliefs, perhaps assumptions, on the topic, but now I need more.  What do you see death as?  How does one deal with death?  I mean I guess how do I balance my belief in the everlasting with the incredible sadness I feel?  It seems the two should be incompatible.  I know that our time apart will be very brief on a cosmic timeline, but if I know that then why am I so upset?  How have different pagan cultures dealt with death through time?  Are there rituals that help? I know that is a lot of questions.

Audrey
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« Reply #1: August 21, 2010, 07:15:24 pm »



You're upset because it's a very natural psychological process for humans to move through grief. I'll put out there that it would be abnormal not to register your friend's eventual passing with some amount of sadness, no matter what you believe about the afterlife.

Personally, I see no reason to believe in the soul or any eternal part of human beings, and thus no afterlife. If I had to pick, I'd want to be a ghost and just chill for the rest of eternity somewhere. I see death is something natural and needed in a changing universe. So long as things are born, things must die. And unless we ever win the battle against entropy, things will always need to die. There's loss, but there's also transformation under that. You may see a metaphysical transformation of a soul from one part of the universe to another. I see it as a physical transformation. When I die, my body's still staying around. It's going to decompose, eventually go back into the earth, and feed all sorts of critters. My atoms will break apart and form new molecules. Just because that spark of sentience is gone, the story isn't over for me yet.
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« Reply #2: August 21, 2010, 07:21:32 pm »

Firstly, sorry if this in the wrong place, I was not sure where to put it so I guessed.

I have always been very familiar with death, so familiar that I do not differentiate so much between the dead and the living worlds.  I think it is all very connected.  I have had a lot of death experience sort of.  I have been speaking with the dead for as long as I can remember, and I have guided people over a few times before.  I have also lost people I love very much and that always feels so different from the other experiences.  I have a hard time seeing through the grief.  I just sort of felt that I had conceptually come to understand death. 

Now however things have changed.  One of my best friends will be beyond the breath in 6 months time.  I just found out today although I sensed it last night sort of.  Now everything I thought I new is in tatters.  I know I should not simply abandon all I have learned due to grief but as I said I have a very hard time seeing anything past my sorrow. 

What I could use is some different perspectives on death and what comes after.  I have always had my own sort of beliefs, perhaps assumptions, on the topic, but now I need more.  What do you see death as?  How does one deal with death?  I mean I guess how do I balance my belief in the everlasting with the incredible sadness I feel?  It seems the two should be incompatible.  I know that our time apart will be very brief on a cosmic timeline, but if I know that then why am I so upset?  How have different pagan cultures dealt with death through time?  Are there rituals that help? I know that is a lot of questions.

Audrey

I think the grief is necessary and normal, not some kind of aberration or sign of lack of faith.  Of COURSE you're sad!  There's a big difference between alive, where you can interact and everything, and dead.  Regardless of your beliefs, faith, and experience, there is a DIFFERENCE.

In the grand cosmic scheme of things, in eons to come, we'll all be petroleum products.  That doesn't make my life any different in the short term, though.  Contrasting cosmic scale to short term just doesn't work.  If I stub my toe, it's gonna hurt like hell right now, regardless of the future.  If you lose a friend - your heart is going to hurt like hell.  That's how it works.

Grief doesn't mean you've lost faith.  It means you're human and you're going to miss your friend.
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« Reply #3: August 21, 2010, 09:12:09 pm »

What I could use is some different perspectives on death and what comes after.  I have always had my own sort of beliefs, perhaps assumptions, on the topic, but now I need more.  What do you see death as?  How does one deal with death?  I mean I guess how do I balance my belief in the everlasting with the incredible sadness I feel?  It seems the two should be incompatible.  I know that our time apart will be very brief on a cosmic timeline, but if I know that then why am I so upset?  How have different pagan cultures dealt with death through time?  Are there rituals that help?

I'm sorry for your pain and the potential loss that you're facing.

Others have said it, but it's worth repeating: grief is a normal process when faced with a loss. 

I'm a firm believer that we continue to exist beyond the moment of death and I've spent most of my life dealing with the dead and dying in one aspect or another.  Being on familiar terms with death  doesn't make us exempt from normal human reactions to the loss of a loved one. Even though I believe that death is a threshold to a new journey, I still grieve the loss of those close to me because I am human and it's what we do in response to loss. 
 
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« Reply #4: August 21, 2010, 09:59:53 pm »

What I could use is some different perspectives on death and what comes after. 
 

Weben Banu said something to me once that I will never forget. 

"Tears are good, and I really think that they are underrated in most modern societies.  I envision the tears we weep as a kind of river, on which the souls of our loved ones may sail gently to their place in the West."

I have my fancy-shmancy rituals that I do for the deceased.  Do they help?  Of course.  However, I don't think any amount of ritualizing for the dead outweighs the healing power of grief. 

If nothing else, your grief is an affirmation of your friend's life, and a powerful sign of how much you love her. 

I am deeply sorry to hear you are going through such a difficult time.  My thoughts and prayers are here for you if you want them.

~Nehet
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« Reply #5: August 21, 2010, 11:23:53 pm »



I don't know that anything that I have to say will be at all useful.  I know that nothing that I have to say will in any way ease your pain.  I know what it's like to grieve.  There are days that I walk around with a feeling that there is simply a hole in my chest that hurts like hell.  There are nights when I can't sleep because if I go to bed I know I'll end up crying and I don't want to wake up my husband.  Some people will say that crying is normal and that being sad is normal, and that being angry, or in denial, or wishing that you could've done anything different, etc. is normal.  The fact is, it doesn't matter if it's normal.  It doesn't make it hurt less because it's normal.

My take on death?  It sucks.  I know it's necessary.  It doesn't mean I have to like it, or that losing someone is any easier.  Fact is, a part of me is glad that I hurt this much.  Because if I didn't hurt this much it means I didn't love my mother-in-law enough.  It's a separation. 

Fact is, I'm pissed as hell.  I get pissed to see assholes living with no health problems, getting away with anything they please, treating people like crap, and that their karma will probably not catch up to them for a while, maybe not even in this lifetime.  And instead of them suffering after living a life of being a jerk to people, my mother-in-law, who for the last 8 years has been the mother-daughter relationship that I had always wanted, and have never acheived with my own mother, who loved openly with no strings attached, had to die of cancer.  I'm pissed that my husband hurts so much over the loss of his mother that he gets pissed anytime he hears of someone beating cancer because if it's all a law of numbers and percentages, if more of them had died, then maybe she would've lived.  Grief isn't rational.  It's completely irrational, and apparently it's normal.  Some people think that being sad or feeling loss or hurting like hell over someone dying means you need to go to a therapist, or a doctor, so that they can prescribe anti-depressant drugs or sleeping pills to help you cope.  Some people don't think that a person should have to feel grief, that drugs or therapy can just make it miraculously vanish.  I don't.

I believe that I've been born and died, and born again, and died again, etc. several times over.  I believe that after my mother-in-law died, she stayed near us for a short while to try to remind us that she loved us.  I also believe that she's moved on.  My father-in-law said that she woke him up every morning at 3am to talk to him for a few weeks after she died, and then one day, she simply didn't.  I don't know what was worse, feeling her near us, or feeling her gone even in her energy.  I -know- that there is more to us than just this lifetime.  I -know- that if it's meant to be, I will probably meet my mother-in-law in another lifetime, and maybe we'll be friends, maybe she'll be my sister, or my daughter, or my aunt, or my grandmother, or even my birth mother next time.  But once again, knowing these things doesn't make it hurt any less to lose her now.  I wanted her to be there for my children, to watch them grow up.  She promised me that she wasn't going to die from the cancer, that she would be here to see my children get married.  It was the first promise she ever broke, and I know she didn't want to or mean to.  I was in denial that she'd even died and that maybe I'd wake up and it would be a horrible dream... until my husband handed me a box with her name on it.  I couldn't figure out who had sent her a package after she died.  They didn't.  It was her ashes.  They are still sitting on my piano until we are able to put them in a garden that has not been planted yet.  Those ashes aren't her.  I can't feel her energy there, I never have.  Her spirit simply isn't attached to them.  But I know that her spirit remains somewhere.  Whether I can feel her near me anymore or not, I -know- that she is not simply gone.

One of the most helpful things that anyone has told me during this whole process is that the pain never truly goes away.  It will dull over time, and you learn to live with it.  That's what I hope for.

For myself and my family, I hope that we can keep her memory alive in us as best as we can.  For her, I hope that the next life she chooses will be a good one.  For my father-in-law, who lost his soul mate, his wife of 42 years at age 60, I hope that he can manage to stay with us even though I know that my own pain is miniscule in comparison to his.  Death is loss.  Loss sucks.  There is absolutely nothing adequate to say about it.  Maybe a death after a long life, passing away peacefully in your sleep can be a romantic or beautiful thing that some people dream of.  But that's not the loss I've experienced, and from what it sounds like, it's not the loss you're expecting to experience either.  I'm so sorry that you're having to go through it.  Cherish the time you have left, and make sure that there is nothing left unsaid.  It may be as you said, that our time together in this life is brief in the cosmic timeline, but our experiences, our loves, our losses, are what make it up.  You will be upset, regardless of your beliefs, regardless of rational thought.  It's not rational, it's emotional.  We are emotional beings.  It's part of what makes us human. 

As I said... nothing I could say will make things better, but you're not alone.
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« Reply #6: August 22, 2010, 08:21:14 am »

(((Audrey and Ana)))

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« Reply #7: August 24, 2010, 10:05:23 am »

I think the grief is necessary and normal, not some kind of aberration or sign of lack of faith.  Of COURSE you're sad!  There's a big difference between alive, where you can interact and everything, and dead.  Regardless of your beliefs, faith, and experience, there is a DIFFERENCE.

Grief doesn't mean you've lost faith.  It means you're human and you're going to miss your friend.

Thank you for this as I have been feeling badly for occasionally questioning my faith.  I mean I did a ton of healing rituals and prayers for her and apparently none of them worked.  I just keep telling myself that they cannot always work that does not mean that the principle was wrong.  All I can hope for now is to help make her journey and easy one but I simply do not know how to do that, I have never done it for someone I know.

Part of the problem is that she is in another country so I cannot see her.  But when she leaves i will not be able to go to the funeral, or the grave.  Those things are important to me, they are how I know it is over.  Now I will not have that and I think it is making me actually pre-mourn.  I feel a little silly as she is not gone yet but I still cannot accomplish the basic life activities.

Ana, I am so sorry that you know this pain too.  That was a beautiful story about your mother in law staying around a while after.  It is good to know that I am not alone, but I wish at the same time that no one else knew these feelings.

For some reason it just seems as if I should be able to spiritually reason this away. I guess it is part of the great mystery and it is not to me to have expectations.  I believe so strongly in my faith I am sure that it is the path for me.  But now I find myself not wanting to speak to the deities.  Especially Brighid as she is the one that I prayed to all the time.  The conflict is that I love her and she is a great comfort to me.  I know I should not be angry with her as I suppose it is quite possible that only the earth how power over death, maybe she could not do anything.  I feel guilty about being angry, I mean it seems wrong to be angry at ones deities.  I can let my anger go, but right now it is the only thing that seems to keep me from being sad all the time.   I do not know, I guess I will learn much from dealing with this and maybe I come out better.  I do not see that happening, but I want to believe that this all has something of a purpose.
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« Reply #8: August 24, 2010, 10:59:56 am »

Thank you for this as I have been feeling badly for occasionally questioning my faith.  I mean I did a ton of healing rituals and prayers for her and apparently none of them worked.  I just keep telling myself that they cannot always work that does not mean that the principle was wrong.  All I can hope for now is to help make her journey and easy one but I simply do not know how to do that, I have never done it for someone I know.

One of the things in your case that I would really encourage is letting go and leaving the insulators of belief by the roadside.  This is a bit like trying to officiate your own wedding.  Therapists don't counsel their own family members.  You're too close to the situation and it looks like you're confused about which role to take.  If physical distance is already a challenge, it makes it all the more appropriate for you to remain in a family/ close friends role. 


Quote
For some reason it just seems as if I should be able to spiritually reason this away. I guess it is part of the great mystery and it is not to me to have expectations.  I believe so strongly in my faith I am sure that it is the path for me.  But now I find myself not wanting to speak to the deities.  Especially Brighid as she is the one that I prayed to all the time.  The conflict is that I love her and she is a great comfort to me.  I know I should not be angry with her as I suppose it is quite possible that only the earth how power over death, maybe she could not do anything.  I feel guilty about being angry, I mean it seems wrong to be angry at ones deities.  I can let my anger go, but right now it is the only thing that seems to keep me from being sad all the time.   I do not know, I guess I will learn much from dealing with this and maybe I come out better.  I do not see that happening, but I want to believe that this all has something of a purpose.


What I found helped, was to wait to process this in accordance with spirituality -first get through the moment.  Give over any responsibility to action regarding your friends death to that which has been doing death since long before any human logic ever attempted to make rules about how we should or should not deal with it.  Holding yourself to any standard of how one 'should' cope with death, regardless of faith is to forget that you are human - and so is your friend.  You are not death, only experiencing how it affects you.  That being the case to try to come up with a spiritually correct experience can put you into conflict with your spirituality because in this case it is an individual not a spirituality that you need to focus on for a little while.

Later on there will be plenty of time to go back over your perceptions of the workings of the unknown, and to categorize them according to the system that works best for you.

There WILL be a moment of anger, and hey.  More power to it.  Perfection on any path is not the repressing of emotion, or making emotion wrong.  Sanitizing emotion with spiritual anti-depressants eventually corrupts the spirituality.  Leave being god to your gods. 
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« Reply #9: August 24, 2010, 12:51:12 pm »

Firstly, sorry if this in the wrong place, I was not sure where to put it so I guessed.

I have always been very familiar with death, so familiar that I do not differentiate so much between the dead and the living worlds.  I think it is all very connected.  I have had a lot of death experience sort of.  I have been speaking with the dead for as long as I can remember, and I have guided people over a few times before.  I have also lost people I love very much and that always feels so different from the other experiences.  I have a hard time seeing through the grief.  I just sort of felt that I had conceptually come to understand death. 

Now however things have changed.  One of my best friends will be beyond the breath in 6 months time.  I just found out today although I sensed it last night sort of.  Now everything I thought I new is in tatters.  I know I should not simply abandon all I have learned due to grief but as I said I have a very hard time seeing anything past my sorrow. 

What I could use is some different perspectives on death and what comes after.  I have always had my own sort of beliefs, perhaps assumptions, on the topic, but now I need more.  What do you see death as?  How does one deal with death?  I mean I guess how do I balance my belief in the everlasting with the incredible sadness I feel?  It seems the two should be incompatible.  I know that our time apart will be very brief on a cosmic timeline, but if I know that then why am I so upset?  How have different pagan cultures dealt with death through time?  Are there rituals that help? I know that is a lot of questions.

First, Audrey and Ana please know that you are in my thoughts and my heart. 

Death to me represents many things.  Natural transition, loss, pain, sorrow, joy, ending, beginning and so on. 

I appreciate how difficult the grieving process is.  When my mother moved to the House of Donn I was devastated.  There was no warning, no illness.  My pain and sense of loss was overwhelming.  I intellectually understood what had happened to her but could not transfer those thoughts to why I was feeling what I was feeling. 

I spoke with the Elders seeking advise and comfort.  It was at that time that a very wise woman offered me the concept that grief was a gift given to human beings out of love.

If we experience all of our pain and despair at once: we would die from the sheer weight of it.  Grieving is the gift of time and encouragement to feel loss (which in turn allows us to focus on the love we shared with an other).  Pain spread a little thinner so that we may survive loss.  I have now (after a great deal of thought and reflection) adopted the philosophy and it seems to work well for me.  To understand that a) that grief is a gift and b) that is necessary and natural helps me to endure much better.  Realizing the "whys" helped be with the "whats" of grieving.


A few months ago I was moved to write the following poem about grief.  It was my way of expressing some of the things that I was experiencing.  Hope that it offers you the time and space to grieve well.

The Dancer

Oh the dance
You and me, the sway and swing
My courter, my stalker, my love
Embrace me with your brutal pain
Make me promises
Free me from the darkness or descend me further
Hear my plea
Still the sway, the swing

Fill the void-fill me up
Take me through the steps
Each miserable footfall
Cover me in your cloak
Cut my hair and paint my eyes
Exact your price for love-your pound of flesh
Feel glory in my anger, smirk at my pleading
Still the sway, the swing

Always the dark time
Where is the light?
You are kindness yet
Bargains don’t interest you
You let me go only to clutch at me again
Teach me to keen and wail, help my tears flow
Still the sway, the swing

Take my breath, my will to carry on
Take my smile, my laughter
Offer nothing less than searing pain
Lift my eyes, let me see again
How about surrender, will you accept?
What can fill the heavy hole of my heart?
Tell me, what appeases you.
Still the sway, the swing

Never absent, reluctantly needed
Forgiveness, I forgive.
I love you, I need you
Final goodbyes don’t survive
Still the sway, the swing

My lover, my tormentor what is your name-who are you?

I am your shadow, the one whom never is absent. 
Your savior, your champion, your healer
Your constant companion
Your tunnel while searching for light 
I am always with you; I’ll never leave you my love
We dance forever, always.
Still the sway, the swing

You my dear, my sweet, may call me Grief

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« Reply #10: August 26, 2010, 09:21:35 pm »

One of the things in your case that I would really encourage is letting go and leaving the insulators of belief by the roadside.  This is a bit like trying to officiate your own wedding.  Therapists don't counsel their own family members.  You're too close to the situation and it looks like you're confused about which role to take.  If physical distance is already a challenge, it makes it all the more appropriate for you to remain in a family/ close friends role. 


This is a very good point, one that I think I have been forgetting.  You are right, I am way to close to be anywhere near what she need from the spiritual realm as a guide and anything like that.  Mostly because in all honest when the time came instead of helping her along I would be wanting her to stay and that would not be good at all.  I am trying to let the spiritual aspect a little aside and just experience grief and sadness as any other person would but it is very hard.  My whole life is always wrapped up in all of this, but from such a different angle that I do not know how to have a good perspective on this now. 

I suppose the best thing to do is just take everything day to day and deal with what I can at that moment.  Right now that means a lot of baking is taking place, and very little else.  But each day I can handle doing more and I guess eventually this becomes everyday life. 

Thank you for all of the support.

Audrey
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« Reply #11: December 01, 2010, 03:03:55 pm »

Firstly, sorry if this in the wrong place, I was not sure where to put it so I guessed.

I have always been very familiar with death, so familiar that I do not differentiate so much between the dead and the living worlds.  I think it is all very connected.  I have had a lot of death experience sort of.  I have been speaking with the dead for as long as I can remember, and I have guided people over a few times before.  I have also lost people I love very much and that always feels so different from the other experiences.  I have a hard time seeing through the grief.  I just sort of felt that I had conceptually come to understand death. 

Now however things have changed.  One of my best friends will be beyond the breath in 6 months time.  I just found out today although I sensed it last night sort of.  Now everything I thought I new is in tatters.  I know I should not simply abandon all I have learned due to grief but as I said I have a very hard time seeing anything past my sorrow. 

What I could use is some different perspectives on death and what comes after.  I have always had my own sort of beliefs, perhaps assumptions, on the topic, but now I need more.  What do you see death as?  How does one deal with death?  I mean I guess how do I balance my belief in the everlasting with the incredible sadness I feel?  It seems the two should be incompatible.  I know that our time apart will be very brief on a cosmic timeline, but if I know that then why am I so upset?  How have different pagan cultures dealt with death through time?  Are there rituals that help? I know that is a lot of questions.

Audrey

I believe that the soul is a very complex thing and that it links back to CREATOR through a series of states. There is the individual soul and it is already a part of everything it is connected to, that links with the higher self which is the part of you that is at a higher energy vibration then the rest of you, then that links to the oversoul which is the higher self manifested in other realms, next it is joined to the collective soul which is where the oversouls are joined together.

When two people are from the same collective soul they are kindered spirits. The oversoul stores all manifestations of the individual soul. so a person can be a wayward spirit and have reincarnated into a new form at the same time and quite possibly not even in the same realm as it's previous carnation. When a spirit roams the earth the oversoul has lost part of itself. I beieve we are here to experience manifestation in various realms as divine expressions of CREATOR. All eventualy reunite with the whole. Then after we reunite for a while we go out again to try different manifestations.

Thanks for reading my point of veiw of things but I truely believe that all points of veiw are right from their own perspective. Isn't it grand that all of this is occuring now, all of those beliefs!
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Adder
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« Reply #12: February 28, 2011, 06:47:38 pm »

What I could use is some different perspectives on death and what comes after.  I have always had my own sort of beliefs, perhaps assumptions, on the topic, but now I need more.  What do you see death as?

As far as I can tell something metaphysical exists which either carries away the pattern of our accumulated feelings (soul), and perhaps thoughts though they might just be logical structures of feelings, to connect to a source - or our soul always have existed within, or transcend across to upon death, another dimension which allows non-physical existance of the soul.

My personal belief tends to align somewhat with a tree of life analogy, you could consider the Goddess/Heaven/God to resemeble a tree insofar as the arrangement of spiritual energy within her, with the trunk and branches being those souls from times gone past, animals the leaves and humans the flowers. The nutrients within the tree exist thoughout the tree and it is that which is all our souls. Capable of experiencing each part of the trunk, each branch, each leaf and every flower. If I was right, then after death your soul rejoins that tree of life and you'd be connected to and experiencing any aspect of the past and present experiences. Interaction with the physically living requires being able to connect to that persons soul in such a way that their physical mind would be able to understand - which in my opinion constitutes the body of religious and spiritual works throughout human history. So if you believe that analogy then as humans we are just basically beacons of love and when death occurs the persons soul is just being released back into its natural state (the tree) which we are all connected to in life, and part of after death. I hope that is of help in some way.
« Last Edit: February 28, 2011, 06:50:15 pm by Adder » Logged

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Drgong
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« Reply #13: March 20, 2011, 11:57:25 pm »



What I could use is some different perspectives on death and what comes after.  I have always had my own sort of beliefs, perhaps assumptions, on the topic, but now I need more.  What do you see death as?  How does one deal with death?  I mean I guess how do I balance my belief in the everlasting with the incredible sadness I feel?  It seems the two should be incompatible.  I know that our time apart will be very brief on a cosmic timeline, but if I know that then why am I so upset?  How have different pagan cultures dealt with death through time?  Are there rituals that help? I know that is a lot of questions.

Audrey

There is a physical body, and a spirit body.  Upon death the body is laid to rest, while the spirit exists in a spiritual world where it still exists.   Since I am LDS, I also think that in the end everyone who lived will be resurrected, and some people who have done the proper rites and followed life accordingly will be blessed with what effectively is deification.   

However, on the Grief, that is totally understandable, it is part of the human existence. 
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son of dhamma
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« Reply #14: March 21, 2011, 04:48:33 pm »

What I could use is some different perspectives on death and what comes after.  I have always had my own sort of beliefs, perhaps assumptions, on the topic, but now I need more.  What do you see death as?  How does one deal with death?  I mean I guess how do I balance my belief in the everlasting with the incredible sadness I feel?  It seems the two should be incompatible.  I know that our time apart will be very brief on a cosmic timeline, but if I know that then why am I so upset?  How have different pagan cultures dealt with death through time?  Are there rituals that help? I know that is a lot of questions.

Audrey

  Death is the pinnacle of the unsatisfactoriness of life, the polar counterpart to living and clinging to everything we want the world to be or not be.  Understanding death and its inevitable nature, and its immanence of life, is the key to seeing beyond the pain of it in any form.  This is of course the way of all things; understanding.  And so it is perfectly natural for you to reevaluate your understanding of death when you are still confronted by a wall of pain, as you are now.
  Now, as far as I'm concerned, death is merely an indication of the continuity of life.  Not so much life as whatever worldly things we cling to, not life as the hand holding onto the strings of the balloons.  The meaning I consider is more so like this:  You've either eaten all the fruit you can eat in your life, you're tree no longer produces fruit that you can eat in your life, both of events occur simultaneously or, you eat a very bad fruit.  Once you've starved or died of poison, the seeds fall and you end up with a brand new tree, either more poisonous or less, and it's up to you which seeds you'll be planting in the future.

  Nothing in the world simply ends, no life runs into a black wall and disappears forever.  If there once was something--a brother, an old woman sitting on a bench, a hungry bird, a friend--then there must be something else even once that thing has fallen apart like an old worn sandbag.  It had its reasons for dieing, this is the way of all things.  Not really sad or happy reasons, merely reasons.  Understanding the reasons is the key to absolving ones grief.
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