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Author Topic: Names: Given & Chosen  (Read 26948 times)
Star
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« Reply #15: June 05, 2007, 03:15:52 pm »

Do you feel like you resonate with your given name? If it doesn't seem to fit, how did you (or will you) go about finding one that fits better?

Well...  I've never really felt any kind of "resonance" per se with my given name in the sense of feeling like it held the Great Cosmic Significance of Me, but it doesn't feel "wrong" to me either.  I did once try to change it to a more common spelling (well, in my area anyway Sarah is more common than Sara) because I was tired of people spelling it wrong, but that didn't take.  That did feel wrong.  So I guess the "real" way is right.

"Star" is equally right, though, in its own way.  And although I know it sounds like it should have some kind of mystical Pagan significance, it doesn't.  It has its roots in Scooby-Doo, actually, and was given to me in high school before I ever thought of being Pagan.  And was given to me fairly randomly...  there's not a lot of Great Cosmic Significance there either.

Those are both names I was given, not names I chose.  I've never really felt the need to choose a name for myself...  When I do, it's inevitably a false front, a persona to be used on the Net when I don't want my real self put out there for everyone to see.  The real "me" lies in names that came from outside myself.

I'm not sure what that says, LOL.  But it's the way things have turned out.
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« Reply #16: June 05, 2007, 03:18:23 pm »

Hm, I do understand what you mean, do you think this is a kind of 'past live' stuff? (Don't remember if you do or do not believe at all in reincarnation).

But sometimes, when I journey, I visit a place and I do look so very different from my now when I'm there - that the question if there is not only a true name, but kind of a true 'form' appears...

That's part of what's weird.  I don't believe in true one-to-one reincarnation.  And I'm not even sure if the face I'm expecting is *human* or not.

But it's not mine that I expect to see.
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« Reply #17: June 05, 2007, 04:24:39 pm »

Do you feel like you resonate with your given name? If it doesn't seem to fit, how did you (or will you) go about finding one that fits better?

For those of you who use a different name in religious/magical workings and groups, how did you come about it? What does it mean for you, and what does it do for you? Do you have different names for different situations? Different names for use when addressing different gods?

I've never particularly liked my given name and stopped using it entirely when a certain horror author decided to give a murderous 1958 Plymouth Fury the same name (not to mention that it means female follower of Christ).  So I go by Chris and it suits me better.

Aisling is the name I use for all things spiritual and it was given to me by a beloved one who knew me well and who (I think) had a good idea where my path was going to take me.  For those who aren't familiar with it, the name means dream or vision in Irish.  Really very fitting for much of my spiritual practice involves shamanic-type work and lucid dreaming. 
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« Reply #18: June 05, 2007, 06:05:48 pm »

Do you feel like you resonate with your given name? If it doesn't seem to fit, how did you (or will you) go about finding one that fits better?

I dislike my given name to the point that I've spent the last three or four years going back and forth on possibly changing it legally.  (I am not a flower.  Not even a kind of annoying one that tangles people up and trips them.)  I've never been good at remembering to answer to it, because it doesn't sound like me.

Several years ago, I found the name "Kiya" in a list of known Egyptian names, and I started using it -- first in my playing Egyptian city-builders, actually, and about a year ago I swapped to declaring it my preferred social name, and most of my friends have been pretty good about remembering the shift.  (But hell, a number of my local friends have a friend who legally changed his name to "Megazone", they're adaptable.)  I'm much more an obscure junior wife of a horribly disgraced heretic sort of person than a flower sort of person. Wink  (The etymology I've seen for the name is that it means "jovial lady", which is, I think, a reasonable aspiration as well as a way of honoring my Lady, Hetharu.)

Quote
For those of you who use a different name in religious/magical workings and groups, how did you come about it? What does it mean for you, and what does it do for you? Do you have different names for different situations? Different names for use when addressing different gods?

I once cracked up an open ritual at MIT by identifying myself as "Darkhawk, both in the Craft and on the 'net."  The fact of the matter is, though, that Darkhawk is my personality aspect best suited to dealing with groups of non-intimate; I've gotten less comfortable with it in groups like my Feri training group, where we did become intimates over the two years we worked together.

All but one or two of my aspect handles came about when I was fourteen or fifteen and reading a fair amount of neo-Wiccan material.  I sort of spent an evening letting my mind spin out names and handles, and deciding which ones felt like me; every time I came up with one, though, some other part of my mind would say, "Okay, that's good for that bit, but what about me?"

The vagaries of my aspects and the circumstances in which various names are relevant is the sort of thing that mostly comes up in very intimate circumstances; for general interaction it is reasonable to treat me as a unitary entity and refer to that unitary entity as 'Darkhawk' or 'Kiya'.
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« Reply #19: June 05, 2007, 06:08:35 pm »

Those are both names I was given, not names I chose.  I've never really felt the need to choose a name for myself...  When I do, it's inevitably a false front, a persona to be used on the Net when I don't want my real self put out there for everyone to see.  The real "me" lies in names that came from outside myself.

The Celt feels a lot like this; he's expressed on occasion that he's not entirely happy with his given name, but he doesn't feel that it's ... respectable?  Or something?  I'm really not sure on the nuances here -- anyway, he doesn't feel right looking for a new one.

I think he figures that somewhere along the line someone will gift him with an appropriate name, if he's meant to have another one.
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« Reply #20: June 05, 2007, 06:13:36 pm »



<snippage> (But hell, a number of my local friends have a friend who legally changed his name to "Megazone", they're adaptable.) 



<snippage>

My geek's showing. Please tell me he didn't change his surname to "23."

:-)
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« Reply #21: June 05, 2007, 06:14:33 pm »

My geek's showing. Please tell me he didn't change his surname to "23."

I believe 'Megazone' is his full name, no surname.
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« Reply #22: June 05, 2007, 06:19:14 pm »

Do you feel like you resonate with your given name?

Randall has always worked just fine for me. Wink
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« Reply #23: June 05, 2007, 06:24:32 pm »

I think he figures that somewhere along the line someone will gift him with an appropriate name, if he's meant to have another one.

My feelings EXACTLY!  Unfortunately, it hasn't happened yet.

~MI
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« Reply #24: June 05, 2007, 06:33:41 pm »

The Celt feels a lot like this; he's expressed on occasion that he's not entirely happy with his given name, but he doesn't feel that it's ... respectable?  Or something?  I'm really not sure on the nuances here -- anyway, he doesn't feel right looking for a new one.

I think he figures that somewhere along the line someone will gift him with an appropriate name, if he's meant to have another one.

YES! that is the way I feel. I have searched my whole life or a kinda right name, and have decided that perhaps I'll just wait until someone finds one for me. That would be nice.

although I have long ago given up on finding that "AHA! that's ME" name, and just hope to someday hear myself called something that doesn't make me grit my teeth. Something kind of  close enough that I can be at ease with me being that name.
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« Reply #25: June 05, 2007, 06:53:16 pm »


And lastly, if you'd like to share any of your names, that'd be neat. Cheesy

Magically I've been working with a variety of names lately, depending on who I'm talking to.  I don't really give much significance to what I'm called on a day to day basis because I don't think I can define my entire self in a word.  This makes my name - Amanda, more of a legal necessity than a container.  Although I find the name to be stuffy and uptight and not the least bit a fit describer of my wonderful self.   Wink yeah I want to slap me for that too.  As names go there are far worse, but I could think of something better.

When I'm working, defining self to the gods ans spirits, lately I've been calling myself as Ocatli.  I wouldn't mention it publicly, use it publicly, or go by it even in pagan circles.  It's just for magical intent.  It's developed from the root word Ocatillo, which is a plant name, derived from the Aztec word for torch, ocatl.  Ocatli would be little torch, and Ocatlin would be beloved little torch.  lol.  I use all of them, depending on how self effacing I'm being.  Ocatli is how I refer to my relationship to myself. I kind of wonder if this has anything of numeric significance, since I the names I have used in the long term seem to have a similar vibe.  Seichi, Mandi, Ocatli.


When relating to my relationship with my patroness, I am Tonans Hawk, in ancestor worship, Mashquanonit, little hawk woman.

If I were to have to go by a given name, I would be reduced to Nana, since that's what my sister called me until she was 16.  As a little little kid, she couldn't say mandi, or amanda, so she called me nana and it stuck for years and years.

I worked hard to bury that one.  She also called me mandinki for a few years, making fun of my overly dramatic personality.  I am Z Great Mandinki.

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« Reply #26: June 05, 2007, 08:10:52 pm »

I love my name.  I'm glad my parents named me what they did, and feel pretty lucky, actually, since it's what everybody calls me. Wink

I love "Lisa", with the long and the short vowel sounds -- I can usually tell what somebody is expecting of me simply by hearing them pronounce my name.
Ha!  I knew there was another one here (you'd expect there to be several, but if so, the rest are hiding), but I couldn't remember who it was.

I vaguely remember a time when I wasn't sure it suited me (Lisas in books and stuff always seemed to be brunettes), but I've always liked it.  Short enough that it doesn't have to be shortened before it can be used, and versatile - it could belong to a duchess or a showgirl, to a toddler or a grandmother, to a nurse or an engineer.  It's elegant, but not at all frilly.  Even nicer, I'm about six years ahead of when it was really popular, so it was distinctive but not uncommon when I was growing up.

I'll be posting again about some other names I have, or have had, and where they came from, but there are several that have interesting stories (I can tell they'll be interesting because of resonations with others' stories) so it's too long of a post for now.

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« Reply #27: June 05, 2007, 08:36:26 pm »

Do you feel like you resonate with your given name? If it doesn't seem to fit, how did you (or will you) go about finding one that fits better?

For those of you who use a different name in religious/magical workings and groups, how did you come about it? What does it mean for you, and what does it do for you? Do you have different names for different situations? Different names for use when addressing different gods?

And lastly, if you'd like to share any of your names, that'd be neat. Cheesy

At work, I'm Jennifer or Jen - never Jennie/Jenny (though I went by both as a child and through my mid-teens - people who know me now have a tremendously hard time believing that)

I'm using Jenett very broadly in my local Pagan community, with groupmates, and online. Just had this conversation this week - there's a whole set of people in my life these days who forget that my legal name is Jennifer (even my current housemates, who see my mail come in....) And who don't think I am one. (The name was the most popular girls' name in the US for five years on eihter side of the year I was born, so it's incredibly common.)

I started using Jenett - and the Cauldron was one of the first places I started using it, actually - because I wanted something identifiable online, and yet not revealing legal identity. (Jennifer by itself is not very unique, and neither is something like "Jen in Minnesota") I'd used another pseudonym online for quite a while at that point (Gwynyth), but wanted to pick something new for Pagan interaction, and for a new stage in my life.

I picked Jenett for a bunch of reasons: it happens to include elements of both parts of my legal name, though that didn't occur to me for a while. It's also one of the variant names for the heroine of the Tam Lin ballad, a song/story that's long had really strong resonance for me. (She doesn't always make the brightest decisions, but she does follow through on the consequences with courage and a certain amount of grace and bloody-mindedness.) It also happens to be a lovely old English witchy name, though that's mostly because it was fairly common in the areas most hit in the English witch trials.

I took it as my dedication name, when I joined the group I work with, and continue to use it broadly.

I took an initiation name, at my first degree. That I don't share with people I'm not willing or potentially likely to enter more intimate circlework with.  It's associated with the color silver, though. (And it's probably no surprise that even though I'm 32, there's a substantial amount of silver-gray in my hair these days. My family grays early, but not quite usually the way mine's coming in.)

I'm currently looking at approaching my 3rd degree, and while I didn't take a new name at 2nd, have known for a while that I wanted to take a new (or rather, additional) name at my 3rd. I intend to keep my first degree name somewhat more private (it's also somewhat less pronounceable.) and to take another name that I was more willing to be public about, and that would work for more public priestessing/etc. roles. I think I've settled on one, and now I've got to wait to see if it sticks (looks like it) and what people think of it.
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« Reply #28: June 05, 2007, 09:15:44 pm »

Do you feel like you resonate with your given name? If it doesn't seem to fit, how did you (or will you) go about finding one that fits better?

Growing up, I hated my given name (Jordan).  I think it was because when I was in elementary and middle school, Michael Jordan was still playing basketball.  Oh, I so wanted to punch anyone who made that reference.  I could change my name, but I won't for the following reasons

1.  I'm too used to it
2.  I found out that it means "to descend or flow" and given my dark streak, interpret that to mean "descending through hell and flowing down the River Styx
3.  I decided to give the names that I really like (Damien, Seth) to characters in my novels.
4.  If I were to change my name, it would b my last name.  I never liked it because I always thought it was a bit unintellectual (my father's family self-identify as hillbillies and it does have that slant).

So that's one of the reasons why I've decided to publish my novels under a pseudonym.  The other is the nature of my writing.  Since gay erotic doesn't get on the New York Times Bestseller List, I would probably need a day job.  I don't want prospective employers to put my name in a search engine and come up with something I wrote.  Not that I'm ashamed of it--I just don't want it to get in the way of getting employed--besides, if they googled my real name they would find out that I'm a Marvel Comics character.

I came across the name Melamphoros on this page:

http://www.winterscapes.com/sannion/lexicon.htm

Sannion says it means "wearing black" (which I do on a regular basis).  When I used it somewhere else, someone said it meant either "Carrier of Black" or "Bringer of Darkness."  Given my dark streak, I'd this fits.  I don't know the exact etymology, but all of these definitions work well (although I trust Sannion's a bit more).

Even though I don't use names for strictly magickal/ritual use, Melamphoros seems to resonate with me more than Jordan ever did.
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« Reply #29: June 05, 2007, 09:49:48 pm »

Do you feel like you resonate with your given name? If it doesn't seem to fit, how did you (or will you) go about finding one that fits better?

Growing up I hated my name (Marian). I used my middle name (Bernadette). However, I hated Bernie, and Bern and Dette, and no one would say Bernadette.

So I went back to Marian. Problem....no one can pronounce Marian. It's Mary Ann, Miriam, Madeline...so I decided to be Mare. I like it, it fits with my lifelong obsession with horses.

I have another name that Macha gave me when I dedicated to Her.

Phouka
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