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Author Topic: There, I said it!  (Read 79983 times)
Sabine
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« Reply #735: June 14, 2011, 01:39:51 pm »

Quote
Dear Muse,
Would it screw up everything to ask if you could kindly find a dark paranormal story for me to write? I write funny. I like to write funny. People seem to like my funny. But every single Call for Submission out there right now wants dark. *sigh* I don't even necessarily want to write dark, but I do have this desire to sell another story.

I'll go finish writing my funny Gorgon now. And hope my publisher still likes my funny.
TISI!
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« Reply #736: June 14, 2011, 01:53:09 pm »



How about dark and funny?
After all it's called black humor. Wink

Listen Boss-Lady,
you are freaking insane, aren't you?

I don't know what you are projecting on me, I have done nothing to you and I have done nothing wrong.
And frankly, I don't care what issues you have.

One more time dissing me, like this morning, hun, and I'll take my bag and leave you behind - looking really stupid, because, wait - right, you don't find anyone else to do this job.

Wonder why.

I have not hired in your little cozy company to be kicked in the butt whenever you feel like it and if I need to spell it out for you, you damn better bet I will.

I can quit, y'a know. Got the permission today.
So better be careful, Lady.

TISI
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'You had to repay, good or bad. There was more than one type of obligation. That’s what people never really understood.….Things had to balance. You couldn’t set out to be a good witch or a bad witch. It never worked out for long. All you could try to be was a witch, as hard as you could.' Terry Pratchett 'Lords and Ladies'

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Sabine
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« Reply #737: June 14, 2011, 02:00:19 pm »

How about dark and funny?
After all it's called black humor. Wink
My humor is already pretty dark, but when they say they want dark, they're not looking for the chuckles. I find it a bit narrow-minded, personally, but I have this thing where I like getting paid. And hey, at least I'm getting royalties on the giggles, which is what I enjoy writing. I just feel like I'd get a wider platform if I wrote dark. Or, as JR Ward would spell it, dhark. *gg*
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SunflowerP
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« Reply #738: June 14, 2011, 06:29:35 pm »

Dear misguided users of language:

Those core principles your religion/spiritual path has?  They're called TENETS!!!  T-E-N-E-T-S, tenets.

They are not tenants.  Unless, of course, you really do reserve the right to toss them out when they break the conditions of the lease.  But then they're not very "core", are they?

very sincerely indeed, but not yours,
Sunflower

TISI.
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Marilyn (ABSENTMINDED)
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« Reply #739: June 14, 2011, 07:01:21 pm »

Dear misguided users of language:

Those core principles your religion/spiritual path has?  They're called TENETS!!!  T-E-N-E-T-S, tenets.

They are not tenants.  Unless, of course, you really do reserve the right to toss them out when they break the conditions of the lease.  But then they're not very "core", are they?

very sincerely indeed, but not yours,
Sunflower

TISI.


Let's not forget the Gods on Diets.  Or the wandering apostrophes.  (Sorry.  That should be 'apostrophe's' but I couldn't make myself do it.)

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Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack, a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in

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« Reply #740: June 14, 2011, 08:33:15 pm »

Let's not forget the Gods on Diets.  Or the wandering apostrophes.  (Sorry.  That should be 'apostrophe's' but I couldn't make myself do it.)
A while back, I learned a name for those that tickles me very much:  impostrophes.

And, yes, I have a very long list of linguistic gripes.  I doubt this will be the last one I post about in this thread.

Sunflower
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Don't teach your grandmother to suck eggs!
I do so have a life.  I just live part of it online.
“Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others
to live as one wishes to live.” - Oscar Wilde
My blog "If You Ain't Makin' Waves, You Ain't Kickin' Hard Enough", at Dreamwidth and LJ
Steve - ComW
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« Reply #741: June 15, 2011, 09:31:00 am »

A while back, I learned a name for those that tickles me very much:  impostrophes.

And, yes, I have a very long list of linguistic gripes.  I doubt this will be the last one I post about in this thread.

Sunflower

Dear  Cold Cough thing

I Know I have  abad chest. Thats no reason for a cold to lay me out for 3 days! get your act in gear and clear off

There I Said it.
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« Reply #742: June 15, 2011, 05:13:08 pm »


Dear SW Manager,
I am so sick and tired of you speaking down to me like I'm some damn dog. You are not my boss. You do not own the store. You really don't know what you're talking about. You need to just go fuck yourself and your high and mighty horse. And when you need to pull that stick out of your ass, I have no problem ripping it out for you.
TISI

Dear Business I Work For,
Thanks for fucking me over after a year and a half of dedicated service. Your solution to the "problem" is fucking retarded. Moving me to a smaller store does nothing to TRAIN ME IN THE AREAS THAT I AM DEFICIENT. It just makes me waste more gas, be more upset, miss all of my cashiers, and hate you that much more. Way to fuck me over.
TISI
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Dragondaughter
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« Reply #743: June 15, 2011, 05:21:01 pm »


Dear Teammates,

Cool your crap or I am going to go on a rampage against stupid... Most of you won't survive it.

TISI!!!!!!!!!!
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Nehet
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« Reply #744: June 16, 2011, 05:03:34 pm »

Dear Teammates,

Cool your crap or I am going to go on a rampage against stupid... Most of you won't survive it.

TISI!!!!!!!!!!

Dear Batshit Insane Client,

No, we cannot produce a report with all of the credit card numbers and all of the names of all of the customers who have ever made a purchase with you in the three years since you signed up for our services.  We're not a bank.  We're not a credit card company.  We're a payment processor.  We do NOT have customer names, only numbers.  And we're talking about over a thousand pages of into, here.  You want it by 5, New York City time? 

Sure, I'll get you that along with the pony and the flying pigs somewhere around the time when hell freezes over. 

What's that, you say?  You'll found another processor who can get you that info? 

Well good luck with that, and good riddence.

Sincerely,

The tired woman who does not want to take any more calls today. 
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Starglade
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« Reply #745: June 16, 2011, 05:12:11 pm »

Dear misguided users of language:

Those core principles your religion/spiritual path has?  They're called TENETS!!!  T-E-N-E-T-S, tenets.

They are not tenants.  Unless, of course, you really do reserve the right to toss them out when they break the conditions of the lease.  But then they're not very "core", are they?

very sincerely indeed, but not yours,
Sunflower

TISI.

AMEN. (Thank you.)

Dear (generic) You,

Y'know . . . if your happiness hinges entirely on OTHER people acting the way YOU think they should/want them to, then YOU are the one with the problem.

Not them.

TISI.
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« Reply #746: June 18, 2011, 12:55:48 am »

Dear you know who,

If you keep berating and yelling at me because I don't go along with your stupid ideas, you are going to find yourself sans my company pretty darn quick.
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catherine
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« Reply #747: June 19, 2011, 09:16:08 pm »


Dear men of my family,
This pass the buck attitude you have about your 93 year old father has got to stop! Honestly, if you really want me and my son to take care of everything then back the f**k off and let us do what needs to be done! If not, then step up and do it yourselves! Ignoring the health and safety issues won't make them go away!

And another thing, even though it's partially Grandma's fault for spoiling you stupid, I feel pretty damned sure that if she were alive today, she'd be ashamed of the lot of you!

Please, you're all over 60. Can you grow the f**k up now?

There. I said it.
Oh wait, I said it to your faces today! So... There. I said it, again!

 
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victoreia
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« Reply #748: June 20, 2011, 06:03:11 pm »

There. I said it.
Oh wait, I said it to your faces today! So... There. I said it, again!

Good for you!

Dear helicopter parents:

Your child is an adult now by legal standards. This means s/he needs to do all his/her application materials for graduate school alone. Please stop enabling his/her dependence on you by doing all the calling about application statuses, all the material gathering, and trying to talk to his/her academic advisor.

Okay, so your Darling Child may still be living at home, because the economy sucks, and housing costs in Hawaii are insanely high, but really? Calling to brow-beat the admissions office about why the transcripts from the other school don't list the degree as posted, when Darling Child didn't indicate on the transcript request that the transcripts should be sent when the degree is awarded? Paying for everything? Emailing that you can't find the FERPA paperwork that darling child has to sign to allow you to call his/her academic advisor? Darling Child is twenty years old! Let Darling Child grow up, already!

There, I said it.
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« Reply #749: June 23, 2011, 06:51:59 am »



Dear Social worker at the Child Psychiatric Services

Please do not tell my son a computerized test will be boring. His natural curiosity might actually have found it fun, but now he's likely to resent it instead. Just hope he's forgotten your words by the time it happens.

Also, when I say I would like to make my input on when the meetings will be held (due to changing shifts), the flat "No, we work in a team here" was not appreciated. Cause you basically told me the parent wasn't part of the team. There are other ways to phrase it that would make me feel less 'at your mercy'. At least you noted that wednesdays don't work for me.

Thirdly - I know you're public sector, and that therefore it's practically mandatory for one hand to not know what the other is doing, but would it kill you to give a simple list of required papers/ documentation to PPT (the instance that works as your first line of support)? So that we're not having to have the boy tested twice for the same things, bugging the doctor to resend results, etc, etc?

All in all, the meeting today did very little to reduce my stress levels, although I'm grudgingly grateful we're one step further towards a diagnosis/actual help. One year after the first application was sent.

TISI
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