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Author Topic: Job related run-in with Christianity  (Read 15213 times)
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« Topic Start: November 09, 2010, 09:42:56 pm »

Ok, I wasn't sure where to post this at exactly.   Moderators, if it needs moved, please feel free.

I am finding myself in a peculiar situation.  I work for a couple who hold strong christian beliefs.  Not a problem for me normally.  Yesterday, they decided to change the radio station at the clinic (I am a massage therapist) to XM 32, The Message - all contemporary Christian. 

I asked if it would work for me to bring in a CD Player and some (spa type music) CDs to listen to while working on clients and in between.  They are unwilling to compromise there, as this is part of their silent ministry. 

I thought that would fulfill their need to have the music they wanted while they are working, and I will not feel as though I'm having Christianity shoved down my throat.  I did try it, it doesn't work for me.

The sticky part is when I went to work for them they insisted I sign their contract which includes a 2 year, non-compete clause.  I am in a small town, and am not excited about making waves.

Is there any one on here that might have some legal expertise about how to gracefully resolve this.  I am more than happy to cease working for them and start my own business.  I worry that they will be stinky about the non-compete clause.

Thanks for any help... let me know if I need to clarify anything.

Lizard
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« Reply #1: November 09, 2010, 10:28:25 pm »

Ok, I wasn't sure where to post this at exactly.   Moderators, if it needs moved, please feel free.

I am finding myself in a peculiar situation.  I work for a couple who hold strong christian beliefs.  Not a problem for me normally.  Yesterday, they decided to change the radio station at the clinic (I am a massage therapist) to XM 32, The Message - all contemporary Christian. 

I asked if it would work for me to bring in a CD Player and some (spa type music) CDs to listen to while working on clients and in between.  They are unwilling to compromise there, as this is part of their silent ministry. 

I thought that would fulfill their need to have the music they wanted while they are working, and I will not feel as though I'm having Christianity shoved down my throat.  I did try it, it doesn't work for me.

The sticky part is when I went to work for them they insisted I sign their contract which includes a 2 year, non-compete clause.  I am in a small town, and am not excited about making waves.

Is there any one on here that might have some legal expertise about how to gracefully resolve this.  I am more than happy to cease working for them and start my own business.  I worry that they will be stinky about the non-compete clause.

Thanks for any help... let me know if I need to clarify anything.

Lizard

What if clients were to request something else?
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« Reply #2: November 09, 2010, 10:51:53 pm »

What if clients were to request something else?

Well, when some clients complained about the "Love" channel, complete with bad, bad '70's love songs, they did not change.  This seems to be another way for them to proclaim their faith. 
The best I can do is turn off the speaker in my treatment room, but the speaker in the adjoining room can easily be heard through the wall.
I'm trying to figure out if I can chalk this up as a religiously hostile work environment... or?
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« Reply #3: November 10, 2010, 09:37:21 am »

Ok, I wasn't sure where to post this at exactly.   Moderators, if it needs moved, please feel free.

I am finding myself in a peculiar situation.  I work for a couple who hold strong christian beliefs.  Not a problem for me normally.  Yesterday, they decided to change the radio station at the clinic (I am a massage therapist) to XM 32, The Message - all contemporary Christian. 

I asked if it would work for me to bring in a CD Player and some (spa type music) CDs to listen to while working on clients and in between.  They are unwilling to compromise there, as this is part of their silent ministry. 

I thought that would fulfill their need to have the music they wanted while they are working, and I will not feel as though I'm having Christianity shoved down my throat.  I did try it, it doesn't work for me.

The sticky part is when I went to work for them they insisted I sign their contract which includes a 2 year, non-compete clause.  I am in a small town, and am not excited about making waves.

Is there any one on here that might have some legal expertise about how to gracefully resolve this.  I am more than happy to cease working for them and start my own business.  I worry that they will be stinky about the non-compete clause.

Thanks for any help... let me know if I need to clarify anything.

Lizard

   I don't think that you have much to go on, It is their business. They own it and can play what ever music they please. Most people would be considerate enough to play something that was enjoyed by everyone, but such is life. I agree that saying something along the lines of the music making people uncomfortable is a good Idea, but have you tried being honest? Tell them that you do not share their particular belief system, and that the music makes you uncomfortable?

    I have to ask why this is such a big deal? I understand that listening to music of any kind that you don't like cause you to go crazy, but is it really so serious that you have to quit and file legal action? If you have not told them that it makes you uncomfortable because of your different belief system, than I hardly think that you could chalk your current situation as a religiously hostile work environment. I think I would sit them down and spell it out for them, and try to reach some kind of agreement with all the facts on the table, including the fact that you will be forced to leave if they feel the need to continue the music, even after you have stated your concerns. I don't think that immediate brash action is going to solve your problem. IMHO. Grin


      Mindy
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« Reply #4: November 10, 2010, 10:14:02 am »

Ok, I wasn't sure where to post this at exactly.   Moderators, if it needs moved, please feel free.

I am finding myself in a peculiar situation.  I work for a couple who hold strong christian beliefs.  Not a problem for me normally.  Yesterday, they decided to change the radio station at the clinic (I am a massage therapist) to XM 32, The Message - all contemporary Christian. 

I asked if it would work for me to bring in a CD Player and some (spa type music) CDs to listen to while working on clients and in between.  They are unwilling to compromise there, as this is part of their silent ministry. 

I thought that would fulfill their need to have the music they wanted while they are working, and I will not feel as though I'm having Christianity shoved down my throat.  I did try it, it doesn't work for me.

The sticky part is when I went to work for them they insisted I sign their contract which includes a 2 year, non-compete clause.  I am in a small town, and am not excited about making waves.

Is there any one on here that might have some legal expertise about how to gracefully resolve this.  I am more than happy to cease working for them and start my own business.  I worry that they will be stinky about the non-compete clause.

Thanks for any help... let me know if I need to clarify anything.

Lizard

Question, what was the music channell before yesterday?  (the bad love songs channel?) This is kind of odd, because love songs aren't exactly a christian thing, they're love songs. (or was it christian music and bad 70's love songs?).

Why did they decide to change it? So they could start doing the silent ministry thing?
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« Reply #5: November 10, 2010, 10:24:21 am »

Question, what was the music channell before yesterday?  (the bad love songs channel?) This is kind of odd, because love songs aren't exactly a christian thing, they're love songs. (or was it christian music and bad 70's love songs?).

Why did they decide to change it? So they could start doing the silent ministry thing?
The Love channel was overtaken by Neil Diamond for about a week, during which time (up until last Thursday to my knowledge, I don't work Fridays there)  we were on a Jazz station.  What the owner told me Monday morning is that he and his wife chatted on Sunday and decided they were going to have the station tuned to this Christian station as part of their silent ministry.
And no, the Love station was what it sounds like... check out xmradio.com channel 23 for their playlist.  The current one is xm 32.  Somehow working on a male client with "Let's Get it On" by Marvin Gaye made me (more than) a little uncomfortable, but when I mentioned that, the channel stayed where it was.  BTW - I don't lump that under the bad 70's songs, that category is reserved the squeeky voiced "Loving You" song.

So, I feel that I am being forced to be part of this silent ministry by their choice of music, and not allowing me to bring in an alternative. 
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« Reply #6: November 10, 2010, 10:33:47 am »

   I don't think that you have much to go on, It is their business. They own it and can play what ever music they please. Most people would be considerate enough to play something that was enjoyed by everyone, but such is life. I agree that saying something along the lines of the music making people uncomfortable is a good Idea, but have you tried being honest? Tell them that you do not share their particular belief system, and that the music makes you uncomfortable?

    I have to ask why this is such a big deal? I understand that listening to music of any kind that you don't like cause you to go crazy, but is it really so serious that you have to quit and file legal action? If you have not told them that it makes you uncomfortable because of your different belief system, than I hardly think that you could chalk your current situation as a religiously hostile work environment. I think I would sit them down and spell it out for them, and try to reach some kind of agreement with all the facts on the table, including the fact that you will be forced to leave if they feel the need to continue the music, even after you have stated your concerns. I don't think that immediate brash action is going to solve your problem. IMHO. Grin


      Mindy

I agree that it is their business, and can play what they want.  However if they had been playing this station when I first inquired about working there, I would have passed.  It really isn't part of my intention to file any sort of action, I'm just trying to find a precedent to see if my thoughts are too far out of line.

I have not told them up front that I'm not a Christian.  This is a small, small community - I am trying to avoid having people in my business.  However, would everyone (Christian or no) be ok with being part of their silent ministry?  I feel by virtue of my being there while they are playing this music with the intent that it be part of some ministry, I become part of it too.  I don't want that. I actually don't see why I should need to discuss my religion with them, I have been clear that I am not comfortable with this music, asked for a compromise and was shot down. 

But for an example of how another situation I was uncomfortable in was handled see part of my reply to Mandrina.  I'll add that when I mentioned that situation, the owners laughed it off.
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« Reply #7: November 10, 2010, 11:23:53 am »

So, I feel that I am being forced to be part of this silent ministry by their choice of music, and not allowing me to bring in an alternative. 

Hum "Highway to Hell" as loud as you can. Wink

No, sorry, it really is offensive from them.
But if they not even care about customers complaining, Im afraid I dont see a way to handle this.
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« Reply #8: November 10, 2010, 11:49:43 am »

I agree that it is their business, and can play what they want.  However if they had been playing this station when I first inquired about working there, I would have passed.  It really isn't part of my intention to file any sort of action, I'm just trying to find a precedent to see if my thoughts are too far out of line.

I have not told them up front that I'm not a Christian.  This is a small, small community - I am trying to avoid having people in my business.  However, would everyone (Christian or no) be ok with being part of their silent ministry?  I feel by virtue of my being there while they are playing this music with the intent that it be part of some ministry, I become part of it too.  I don't want that. I actually don't see why I should need to discuss my religion with them, I have been clear that I am not comfortable with this music, asked for a compromise and was shot down. 

But for an example of how another situation I was uncomfortable in was handled see part of my reply to Mandrina.  I'll add that when I mentioned that situation, the owners laughed it off.


I totally get the small town thing, I am from a town of 5000 and am not exactly out of the broom closet so to speak, nor do I plan to be to any one who is not already aware. Life in a small community is hard enough when it comes to rumours and privacy. But what I am saying is that I don't think that it can be considered a hostel religious environment, if the other party is not aware that what they are doing is completely undermining your belief system, knowing it makes you uncomfortable and continues to blatantly shove their beliefs in your face. If they are ignorant to the situation than they can not be held responsible, and as far as I know playing Christian music is annoying but not illegal, especially if you have the option of turning it off in your work station. Perhaps you would be better off speaking to a lawyer about getting out of your non-compete clause. But I would think that any sort of action with religion involved is going to bring your beliefs into the lime light in some way. As far as you not seeing the point of telling them your religious beliefs thats fine and of course your choice, but if someone that worked for me told me they were uncomfortable with my choice in music and would not explain, it would be tough luck. They pay the bills, and they are not telling you that you have to be Christian to work there. I think you would do best to try to find a loop hole in your non-compete clause and go from there. I agree that it is offensive but they don't know that it offends you, only that you don't like their music choice.

I really hope things work out for you. It is the worst thing to have to work some where that you are unhappy. I am sending good energy your way with the hopes that this resolves in your favour.

  Mindy
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« Reply #9: November 10, 2010, 06:33:20 pm »


Not to be harsh, but I've been in the exact same situation in my workplace re: the religious thing, and I've been forced to just suck it up. I'm the only non-Christian in the workplace, and it's just assumed that it's OK to put on the religious radio station after closing, because that's what everyone else can agree on. Of course, I suspect that many of them are for it simply because I'm opposed--I'm not terribly popular in my workplace, partly because I don't hide my religion. If someone asks, I'll tell, but I don't advertise.
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« Reply #10: November 10, 2010, 06:50:31 pm »

I agree that it is their business, and can play what they want.  However if they had been playing this station when I first inquired about working there, I would have passed.  It really isn't part of my intention to file any sort of action, I'm just trying to find a precedent to see if my thoughts are too far out of line.

I have not told them up front that I'm not a Christian.  This is a small, small community - I am trying to avoid having people in my business.  However, would everyone (Christian or no) be ok with being part of their silent ministry?  I feel by virtue of my being there while they are playing this music with the intent that it be part of some ministry, I become part of it too.  I don't want that. I actually don't see why I should need to discuss my religion with them, I have been clear that I am not comfortable with this music, asked for a compromise and was shot down. 

But for an example of how another situation I was uncomfortable in was handled see part of my reply to Mandrina.  I'll add that when I mentioned that situation, the owners laughed it off.

I've known a lot of small business owners that do this and to tell you the truth ... you won't be able to get them to stop by asking or even by telling them why.  In fact that would make it worse probably.  I realize I'm making a blanket statement here so I will say all the Christians in my family, their church, etc. would not.  It's one of those things like ... if they know someone is a Christian and plays Christian music in their store, business, whatever they will spend their money there first because "We are supporting fellow Christians and they are even trying to minister to the public.  You never know what God will use to reach someone!" I can't tell you the times I've heard this ... and then been dragged to that store.  It's my experience that anyone that plays that music in their business is looking for a chance to minister to someone.  In a way, they play the music in order to bring God up.  They let the customer do it but then they stand around for 30 mins talking about God.  The attitude is ... if you don't like don't come in here.  As for employees, same goes for you.  I really don't think you could do anything legally either although I'm not entirely sure as I'm not an attorney.  But I would think that you would be forced to tell them your beliefs in order to use that to leave and set up your own business or even work in that field until your two years was up.  I am small town person too.  Born and bred.  If you tell them you should be prepared for everyone to know and be ready to defend yourself.  I don't know where you live but I'm in the Bible Belt and things can get heated when God comes up.  Especially if you are a 'devil worshiper'.  I understand your reluctance because I know I'm no where near to telling my family or community!  If ever.  I really, really hate to be a downer like this, but I don't know if you have any other option other than to suck it up unless you want to work in another field for awhile.   Sad
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« Reply #11: November 10, 2010, 07:34:02 pm »

I am finding myself in a peculiar situation.  I work for a couple who hold strong christian beliefs.  Not a problem for me normally.  Yesterday, they decided to change the radio station at the clinic (I am a massage therapist) to XM 32, The Message - all contemporary Christian. 

I asked if it would work for me to bring in a CD Player and some (spa type music) CDs to listen to while working on clients and in between.  They are unwilling to compromise there, as this is part of their silent ministry. 

Update... for everyone who has replied so far, thank you.  Curious to hear your views on what happened today...

This morning I approached the husband and asked what this silent ministry was all about.  I wanted to be sure I wasn't reacting to something I misunderstood.  His answer is that it is a way to bring people to Jesus.  I also asked if he was clear that I was not comfortable with this situation, he replied that was clear to him.  We talked about where I was at in the equation, by essentially being forced to be a part of this silent ministry when doing so goes against my beliefs.  He added that having this music going and this ministry was a requirement of working there, one he is not going to compromise on.  I told him we have a problem, he agreed.  We agreed to part ways and he agreed to not hold me to the non-compete clause.

The office manager asks me to not do anything yet, let her talk to him.  The office manager knows the bottom line is that I am a damn good therapist and I make the clinic a lot of money.  She has known him for years and says he just gets this way sometimes.  Meanwhile, she gets the wife to come in on her day off (husband and wife work alternate days).  Wife comes in with a CD player and Spa music CDs.  They prayed about this problem and came up with the CD player as a solution to the problem. 

Really?!  Huh   This is the solution I offered yesterday after I did some soul-searching about what I could do to cope with this change in things.  The solution that I was flat out told no to.  Soul-searching apparently is not as good as praying to Jesus.

So after they realize what this might cost them, they are willing to compromise (keep in mind Monday, Tuesday and even this morning they are unwilling to compromise).  They even offer that they will change the station from time to time as they would like some variety.  Again, really?  I've been there since August, not a very long time, but it was the Love channel up until last week. 

Right now I'm scratching my head trying to figure out if I keep my job, or just go my own way.
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« Reply #12: November 10, 2010, 08:15:48 pm »


We agreed to part ways and he agreed to not hold me to the non-compete clause.


If you decide to part company, get this in writing and witnessed!! Verbal anything wouldn't hold up against your signed non-compete clause if he goes back on it.

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« Reply #13: November 10, 2010, 10:26:52 pm »

Right now I'm scratching my head trying to figure out if I keep my job, or just go my own way.

You seem to have liked working there up until now. They've compromised because they decided they need you to keep working there because you bring in good money for them. I'd keep working there unless things really change. This will reinforce the idea that compromise works with them and apparently make you and them some good money. It's a win all the way around as far as I can see.
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« Reply #14: November 10, 2010, 10:48:53 pm »

So, I feel that I am being forced to be part of this silent ministry by their choice of music, and not allowing me to bring in an alternative. 

As an aside, I find it a little odd to be called a "silent" ministry when it involves making people listen to something.

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