WWPD: What Would Pagans Do?

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[Halstrom]

But what to do about this situation with my friend? Should I secretly remain friends with her? What would you do in a situation like this?

If my friend was in this kind of situation, then I'd try to help them see that the relationship that they were in isn't very good for them! There is no reason why a person should put up with having their or their friends faith belittled!

If I had a girlfriend who did, I would seriously say to her "Goodbye, and don't let door hit your butt on the way out!" Well with stronger language!

[Adoratrix]

So, everyone send up good energies for us, please. And thanks to all of you for helping me out!

Love & Blessings~

*good energies and hugs* Catch!

[Moone]

Just wanted to update everyone on what happened yesterday with my friend.

Everything turned out just fine, better than fine actually.

I was expecting my friend to come alone, but guess what?! Her BF came along! Talk about shocked! I invited them both in and we sat down and had a nice long heart-to-heart with one another. Apparently my friend just laid it all out on the table about me, about her own involvment with paganism and witchcraft, about everything. At first it was pretty ugly, both of them testified to that. Her BF told her he would leave her if she didn't give up her "sinful" ways, to which she replied she would then definitely have to give him up, since they had been living together out of wedlock. She then told him he had no right to judge me or her for our beliefs, seeing as how he himself didn't follow his own religion very well. (You could have knocked me over with a feather at this point, LOL!)

I couldn't believe she actually stood up to him! YAY!!!

Her BF apologized to me and to her in front of me (yes!), told us both that whatever we believed in was our business and he had no right to judge either one of us, because we were both good women and good mothers. And he also apologized for his macho attitude with me at the BBQ. He said that after my friend had told him about what I had put up with in the past with my ex, he was surprised that I hadn't punched his lights out for acting the way he did towards me. I agreed, he was very lucky.

I then brought up the whole thing about my son, which I was still fuming about. Her BF told me it just took him by surprise that my son would know about such things like tarot cards, but he admitted that he was also surprised at how mature, articulate and honest my son was. Apparently, he had expected my son to be embarrassed and shy about answering his questions, but he said my son answered without any hesitation and actually put him on the spot with a few questions of his own, hehe! (That's my boy!)

I asked the BF if he had any children and he said yes, he had a daughter. I then asked him if it had been me watching his daughter, would he have liked it if I had begun asking her all sorts of questions about him and his personal life. He said, no, he would have been really pissed. He then apologized and said he wanted to apologize to my son as well. He said any child with that much confidence and intelligence could not be raised by a neglectful or bad mother. (Now that did surprise me! LOL )

While my friend was in the bathroom, her BF told me that he had no idea that she and I had been through so much together, or that she cared about me so much. He said he could tell that she was upset, and that they were both angry about what had happened last weekend (his rudeness, her lying), but that she really let him have it when he called me a devil worshiper (which he assured me he didn't think that anymore. My friend straightened him out about a few things, he said.). He said he had no idea that she had a temper like that, that she had never shown that side of herself to him until he insulted me. He then said he had a whole new respect for her, and knew to duck and run next time he crossed her, LOL!

So, my girl had my back after all. I'm so proud of her for standing up to him. I knew she had it in her to do it.

So, my friend and I are in great shape, and her BF has a whole new attitude towards me, but even better, towards her. The paganism deal we will have to work on with him, but at least he does love her enough to try, which I am grateful for.

I just wanted to say thanks to everyone for your good thoughts and energies. You were all a big help to me!

Blessings~

Moone

[HeartShadow - Cutethulhu]

WOW!  Wonderful news!

I'm so happy for you AND your friend.  Both for the friendship getting back on track and because she managed to stand up for herself.  Looks like she fell back into bad behaviors for a while - and then realized it and stopped it.  VERY good for her!  (and she's learned that she can stand up for herself and not lose her man, which is even better!)

I'm so happy for you all!

[Ocelot]

Just wanted to update everyone on what happened yesterday with my friend.

Everything turned out just fine, better than fine actually.

Great news! I'm glad it worked out. Just goes to show us that sometimes we imagine the worse case in our mind.

[Moone]

Great news! I'm glad it worked out. Just goes to show us that sometimes we imagine the worse case in our mind.

To be honest, in the back of my mind I did envision the worst... or maybe I was trying to prepare myself for the worst. I've had friends before who get so involved with their new BF/GF that just revolve their whole lives around that person and eventually remove themselves completely from their friends' lives.

Don't get me wrong. I understand what it is to get into a new relationship. You want to spend as much time as you can with them, because everything is new and exciting, you want to get to know them more intimately. I just don't agree with people losing themselves in another person's life. I mean, come up for air every once in a while! Remember that you are still an individual and have a life outside of that relationship.

I was afraid that was going to be the case with my friend this time as well, but I'm so glad it wasn't.

[Glas Cailleach]

So, my girl had my back after all. I'm so proud of her for standing up to him. I knew she had it in her to do it.

So, my friend and I are in great shape, and her BF has a whole new attitude towards me, but even better, towards her.

Im so happy that things worked out for you and your friend

[Dania]

Wow!! You go girl!!!

Maybe her BF isn't such a bad guy after all. *hugs all around*

[sashapablo]

So, my friend and I are in great shape, and her BF has a whole new attitude towards me, but even better, towards her. The paganism deal we will have to work on with him, but at least he does love her enough to try, which I am grateful for.

Wow, that's great! Isn't it amazing how well people can communicate when they are all behaving like mature adults

I'm glad you got your friend back.

Sasha

[Nyktipolos]

While my friend was in the bathroom, her BF told me that he had no idea that she and I had been through so much together, or that she cared about me so much. He said he could tell that she was upset, and that they were both angry about what had happened last weekend (his rudeness, her lying), but that she really let him have it when he called me a devil worshiper (which he assured me he didn't think that anymore. My friend straightened him out about a few things, he said.). He said he had no idea that she had a temper like that, that she had never shown that side of herself to him until he insulted me. He then said he had a whole new respect for her, and knew to duck and run next time he crossed her, LOL!

So, my girl had my back after all. I'm so proud of her for standing up to him. I knew she had it in her to do it.

Thats the thing about water people; get them to a boiling point and they explode like a tsunami.

I'm glad everything worked out; with you and your family, and your friend and her BF. I'm glad he can accept her for who she is. Just because she's pagan doesn't mean he has to be, so he is free to worship who he wants to, and the same with her.

Yay for happy endings! 

[Tj]

To be honest, in the back of my mind I did envision the worst... or maybe I was trying to prepare myself for the worst. I've had friends before who get so involved with their new BF/GF that just revolve their whole lives around that person and eventually remove themselves completely from their friends' lives.

Don't get me wrong. I understand what it is to get into a new relationship. You want to spend as much time as you can with them, because everything is new and exciting, you want to get to know them more intimately. I just don't agree with people losing themselves in another person's life. I mean, come up for air every once in a while! Remember that you are still an individual and have a life outside of that relationship.

I was afraid that was going to be the case with my friend this time as well, but I'm so glad it wasn't.

I don't know where I got this from but I heard this quote somewhere and it made a lot of sense: "Prepare for the worst, hope for the best!". Anyways it is so nice it worked out so nicely, I tend to be a optimist in general and even I would not have envisioned it going this well. Anyways, good luck to you and your friend in the future for working out any issues that crop up later (hopefully you won't need the good luck ).

happy endings really ARE the best.

-Tj

[Shedragon]

I've already decided that I won't subject my son to this anymore. He will not be put through that again. But what to do about this situation with my friend? Should I secretly remain friends with her? What would you do in a situation like this?

Forgive me if my post is not quoted properly, I'm a newbie and learning this board.

Reading this story about your friend touches home because I have a little girl myself.  What worries me the most is what they may have said to your son.  That is always a fear of mine with my daughter, I never want her to feel bad about any choices her mother makes.  

I personally have had a few friendships like this in my life.  Your friend sounds like she is what I call an emotional vampire.  They take what they need from what ever or who ever they can to make themselves feel good.  When they is using drugs or what ever they are doing,  they are getting a good feeling for a short time, then they go to the next thing, your friendship, or a relationship with a man. 

I myself have had to cut these sorts of people away, or just live with it each time they need their dose of "feel good" so they leave me feeling drained.  (thats the only way I can describe it,  I'm very sensitive to energy transfer).




After scrolling up I read your recent posting about your friend bringing her boyfriend over, and I am glad to hear things worked out for the best!

[gayars]

I personally have had a few friendships like this in my life.  Your friend sounds like she is what I call an emotional vampire.  They take what they need from what ever or who ever they can to make themselves feel good.  When they is using drugs or what ever they are doing,  they are getting a good feeling for a short time, then they go to the next thing, your friendship, or a relationship with a man. 

I myself have had to cut these sorts of people away, or just live with it each time they need their dose of "feel good" so they leave me feeling drained.  (thats the only way I can describe it,  I'm very sensitive to energy transfer).

My mother is one of those.  Does she realize it? NO.  It might be best if she did, then she could control it!

Suffice it to say, shielding is a very handy thing to have around my mother

I have been cutting people like that out of my life too.  My mother cannot be one, however, as I am her caregiver, I just stay well shielded.   I am actually working on teaching her to draw energy in during meditation, so maybe, just maybe she can learn another way to feed!

Gina

[Adoratrix]

Just wanted to update everyone on what happened yesterday with my friend.

Everything turned out just fine, better than fine actually.

I just wanted to say thanks to everyone for your good thoughts and energies. You were all a big help to me!

Excellent! I'm glad you three found a way to work everything out. And I especially hope your friend keeps this incident in mind next time she feels pressured to lie about who she is.

[Moone]

I myself have had to cut these sorts of people away, or just live with it each time they need their dose of "feel good" so they leave me feeling drained.  (thats the only way I can describe it,  I'm very sensitive to energy transfer).

EEK! Sounds like my ex-mother-inlaw. I can understand completely what you are talking about. I call 'em psychic vampires, cause they literally suck the life out of you whenever they get near. She's an overbearing type and she's good at what she does. Most people avoid her like the plague, LOL

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