Keeping it Fresh

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[Aster Breo]

Happy New Year, everyone!

I've been reflecting a lot in the last few days.  One of the things I'm currently struggling with is keeping my spiritual growth "fresh".  I'm not 100% sure I know what I mean by that.  I think I'm concerned about getting into a rut, getting stale, not staying as close in touch with Brighid as I want to.

Some of this is because I've been quite sick over the last few months with horrible migraine and cluster headaches.  And then the neverending zombie stomach bug from hell.  I've had a lot of time to just lie there and think.

I light my lamp for Brighid every night, and I keep an electric LED candle on always.  I have my little "shrine shelf" at home, and an unobtrusive shrine-let at work complete with LED candle.  I continue to study and read about Irish mythology and related topics.  I continue to wear my "Brighid jewelry" and listen to my "Brighid music".  I even just received a beautiful pair of stylized Brighid's cross earrings for Christmas.

But I'm missing that zing -- those lightbulb moments -- that shivery feeling.

Could just be that I've been sick and medicated.  Or could be that I've gotten into a rut and need to break out.

I'd love to hear suggestions for what works for others who have found themselves in the same boat.

Thanks!

~MI

[Juniper]

Could just be that I've been sick and medicated.  Or could be that I've gotten into a rut and need to break out.

Happy New Year!

It could just be that you've been sick, but the fact that you have been sick might mean that you are even more in need of connecting with your spirituality. (I hope that you are feeling better by the way?)

Why don't you try going somewhere that reminds you of Brighid? Some place that you know She would like, or that you can feel her presense. This might make it easier to connect with Her again, and/or give you inspiration for other things you could do.

[Dania]

I'd love to hear suggestions for what works for others who have found themselves in the same boat.

Hey Moon~

I've been kind of in the same situation myself, when it came to my pathwork and the religious aspect of my spirituality. Everything got so crazy that I just didn't have the energy, or the desire, to move forward.

Now that things have slowed down a bit, I found what really helped me "get back on track" (aside from just forcing myself to do it) was to take a day or so and just relax, and "reset" my brain so to speak, and figure out what was really important to me and how I can build that back into my life. I ended up spending most of the day in my PJ's writing essays.

When you're sick, it can be really hard. Not that you don't WANT to do what you feel you should, but you don't have the energy. Even though you know it would help you. It becomes a case of "I really want to, and I know I should, I just *can't*". Sometimes "just can't" is a good excuse to take a break...but if it goes on for too long you end up in a rut.

Try doing something "smaller"...even if it's just a little mental note to Brigid while you're watching TV or something... "Hey I'm still here and still care about you, what's up?" sort of thing.

I don't know why I thought of this just now, but have you considered making a sort of "sacred space" in your house where you can meditate, or just crash if you need to, that's away from the rest of the house, the bad energies, etc?

[Finn]

I'd love to hear suggestions for what works for others who have found themselves in the same boat.

The best thing that has helped me get over the feeling that I was (am) in a rut was to keep reminding myself of this:

We all have to be fallow in order to receive. Watch, wait, listen. Take it slow. Take it small. It is not the nature of the world to remain in stasis, and it is not our nature either. Sooner or later (though it may seem not soon enough), this too will pass.

I have to tell myself that when my creativity is in flux: when I'll have two or three months of rapid progress on my writing, and then six or seven months of just staring at the screen, trying to muster up energy and desire to work, and wondering where all the fire has gone.

It's in the ashes, covered over and waiting. There are sparks to watch for, to wait for, and sooner or later, they will be uncovered, and a flame will blaze forth.


Perhaps a bit more passive than you might like, but in tandem with small actions, like a little prayer or note--"hi, how are you?"--you can feel more assured of the progress you are making.

I know that being sick has its own obstacles to add to the natural cycles of productivity and rest, because your own cycles are so out of whack. Remember to take it slow, take it small, and maybe now, in a kind of recovery, is the time when those small sparks can be discovered and nurtured.

[Star]

But I'm missing that zing -- those lightbulb moments -- that shivery feeling.

One thing to keep in mind, that may or may not actually apply...  is that it's not always going to be lightbulbs and shivery moments.  Sometimes it's just going through the day, and, you know, there's nothing wrong with that.  Everyday life happens in spirituality and religion just as much as any other area.  Of course you don't want to stagnate, but just because you're not getting lightbulbs dropped on your head every day doesn't mean you're stagnating. 

Like I said, that might or might not help or apply or whatever, but just thought I'd throw it out there.

[Driven by Dreams]

I think I'm concerned about getting into a rut, getting stale, not staying as close in touch with Brighid as I want to.
I light my lamp for Brighid every night, and I keep an electric LED candle on always.  I have my little "shrine shelf" at home, and an unobtrusive shrine-let at work complete with LED candle.  I continue to study and read about Irish mythology and related topics.  I continue to wear my "Brighid jewelry" and listen to my "Brighid music".  I even just received a beautiful pair of stylized Brighid's cross earrings for Christmas.

But I'm missing that zing -- those lightbulb moments -- that shivery feeling.

I'd love to hear suggestions for what works for others who have found themselves in the same boat.

I royally suck at little daily routine things. I mean, I can barely remember to put fresh water on my ancestor altar and I only do that once a week, so I can understand how you might feel in a rut.

Maybe instead of doing something everyday, if you can take a some extra time out during a week or even once a month and maybe do something bigger. Take a trip somewhere you might feel Brighid's presence or have a little shindig in her honor. Don't overtax yourself, but maybe a quick change of environment might help keep you inspired. Or take a month and make yourself a devotional object or maybe volunteer some time somewhere that has some association with her.

[Celtee]

I agree with Finn's comment that "we all have to be fallow in order to receive."

Even the most lovingly tended garden has a rest period each year in order for new growth/regrowth to occur.  It's not a bad time, necessarily, but rather, a time for resting in preparedness for rebirth in the Spring.

Perhaps this is your fallow period in preparedness for new growth/regrowth/rebirth come Spring.

[SunflowerP]

I agree with Finn's comment that "we all have to be fallow in order to receive."

I third that.  Spiritual development is cyclic; sometimes you're "on" and moving forward at a rapid pace, new insights coming constantly, and sometimes it seems like there's nothing much going on at all.  For me, the latter usually means that I'm assimilating, internalizing all the insights - I may not be aware that's what I'm doing, or not until afterward, so I may feel like I'm marking time, but I've learned that if I don't have times where things are at least a bit slower, I don't get a chance to internalize.

So in a way I see the "staleness" as a somewhat-separate problem:  how, during those times, to keep the devotions and such from becoming rote motions.  I don't really have an answer to that for you, MI; my personal answer has always been not to go the "daily devotions" route in any formal kind of way, but that's not right for everyone.

Sunflower

[Marilyn (ABSENTMINDED)]

But I'm missing that zing -- those lightbulb moments -- that shivery feeling.

It may be that the 'zing' was your honeymoon period.  Now she is a part of your life and consciousness to the point where just living is enough.  I don't think the human mind/soul/spirit can take the constant passion unless they give up everything else.

You've been married for a long time.  You probably don't watch your husband for constant signs of devotion anymore, and, while there are always new things to learn about anybody you pretty much know him.  I'm not saying stop studying, exactly, but you probably already know most of what you are running across now.

Applying what you've learned, and simply living in accordance, is necessarily less exciting, but it is more sustainable.  Maybe you are in a period of integration rather than a rut.  There is value in everything no longer being new.  Spirituality is part of life, and it may be that your devotion to Brigid is no longer a separate aspect of your consciousness but has been merged into the rest of you.

I think minor devotions, more casual signs of love, might be the way to go, saving the big things for, well, big things.  In life relationships we often go from a weekly 'anniversary' to a monthly one to a yearly one, but as the calm times get longer the devotion gets deeper.

Absent

[Aster Breo]

We all have to be fallow in order to receive. Watch, wait, listen. Take it slow. Take it small. It is not the nature of the world to remain in stasis, and it is not our nature either. Sooner or later (though it may seem not soon enough), this too will pass.

Yes!  Thank you, Finn!  This was the first thing I needed to hear, in order to open up to the other great suggestions people have posted.

The idea of a fallow time -- a time to assimilate and rejuvenate -- is so...right.  I did have a VERY fast and furious time of incredible new Brighid-related learnings over the past year or so.  It does make sense that its time for some processing time.

It also makes sense in terms of my own physical health.  A lot of that zingy, shivery connection and new learning was taking place at a time when I was REALLY struggling with a health issue.  Now that I think I've finally found some equilibrium with that (thanks to modern meds), I can now maybe find some equilibrium with the spiritual ideas, as well.

[juniperrr]

I agree with Finn's comment that "we all have to be fallow in order to receive."

Here's a fourth on that. I have found that almost everything runs in cycles, relationships, creativity, mastering something new, just about everything. There is intensity, excitement, fresh discoveries and insights and then slow dogged steps forward and then a point that levels out and feels like going nowhere. That is good, because it is a gathering time for the new leap into the intensity and new insights at a deeper level than before. It could be the last plateau you're reached has been over long because of all the illness.

First off, give yourself permission to just relax and really get well. The cycle will turn again, it flows by itself and usually faster if you do not try to push it. Taking a full break sometimes helps, the sort of 'go away so I can miss you thing', if you feel it's just a habit or chore to light a candle - don't. Take a break for a week or try a new way to accomplish the same thing. You might try just being good to yourself and do one of your favorite things, for me a trip to the beach, just to hear the waves and feel the wind always reminds me of whats real and helps to get me focused again. If I do not have the time to get over the hill to Santa Cruz, I will listen to an 'ocean sounds' cd and do a meditation where I walk down the beach and simply watch the brown pelicans gliding. The great thing about such visualizations is I often just ask a passing pellie what's up and they can answer!

That's a couple techniques I use, the most important (albeit the most frustrating) is just trusting the cycle will turn up again. It always has.

[Aster Breo]

It may be that the 'zing' was your honeymoon period.  Now she is a part of your life and consciousness to the point where just living is enough.  I don't think the human mind/soul/spirit can take the constant passion unless they give up everything else.

And I think this was the second thing I needed to hear.  I'm very sure the human mind can't take the constant passion because I had it for a brief time and it almost killed me.  Literally.  So this is a healthy balance.

You've been married for a long time.  You probably don't watch your husband for constant signs of devotion anymore, and, while there are always new things to learn about anybody you pretty much know him.  I'm not saying stop studying, exactly, but you probably already know most of what you are running across now.

Applying what you've learned, and simply living in accordance, is necessarily less exciting, but it is more sustainable.  Maybe you are in a period of integration rather than a rut.  There is value in everything no longer being new.  Spirituality is part of life, and it may be that your devotion to Brigid is no longer a separate aspect of your consciousness but has been merged into the rest of you.

Yes, I think the bolded part in particular is true.  It's no longer a new thing to be taken out and marveled at.  It's just who I am now.  I wonder, though...is that enough?  For Brighid, I mean.

As for studying, I'm finding that I am way past the generalized books about Celtic history or mythology or whatever.  Now, I'm much more interested in the really deep details.  I'm currently readying a book on polytheistic theology, a book about Newgrange, and two books essentially about the concepts of ancient goddesses.  Now that I've devoured absolutely everything reputable that I can find about Brighid specifically, I think I'm looking for a more textured context to put that information in, rather than just the basic "The Ancient Celtic World" kind of model.

I think minor devotions, more casual signs of love, might be the way to go, saving the big things for, well, big things.  In life relationships we often go from a weekly 'anniversary' to a monthly one to a yearly one, but as the calm times get longer the devotion gets deeper.

This jibes so well with what Dania and others suggested upthread about going somewhere to "refresh" or working on a specific project to dedicate.

Imbolc is coming in one month.  Reading this thread has made me excited about the idea of planning somethign special for Imbolc.  I'm not sure what yet -- but I've got a little time to figure it out.

Thanks, everyone, for your thoughts.  This has been so helpful.

Please chime in if you think of other approaches.

[Garnet]

Here's a fourth on that. I have found that almost everything runs in cycles, relationships, creativity, mastering something new, just about everything. There is intensity, excitement, fresh discoveries and insights and then slow dogged steps forward and then a point that levels out and feels like going nowhere. That is good, because it is a gathering time for the new leap into the intensity and new insights at a deeper level than before.

Off topic, but this was really really helpful for me to read related to job and creativity stuff.  (Creativity *is* my job, so feeling drained and uninspired is pretty scary.)

[Mandi]

Happy New Year, everyone!

I've been reflecting a lot in the last few days.  One of the things I'm currently struggling with is keeping my spiritual growth "fresh".  I'm not 100% sure I know what I mean by that.  I think I'm concerned about getting into a rut, getting stale, not staying as close in touch with Brighid as I want to.

Some of this is because I've been quite sick over the last few months with horrible migraine and cluster headaches.  And then the neverending zombie stomach bug from hell.  I've had a lot of time to just lie there and think.

I light my lamp for Brighid every night, and I keep an electric LED candle on always.  I have my little "shrine shelf" at home, and an unobtrusive shrine-let at work complete with LED candle.  I continue to study and read about Irish mythology and related topics.  I continue to wear my "Brighid jewelry" and listen to my "Brighid music".  I even just received a beautiful pair of stylized Brighid's cross earrings for Christmas.

But I'm missing that zing -- those lightbulb moments -- that shivery feeling.

Could just be that I've been sick and medicated.  Or could be that I've gotten into a rut and need to break out.

I'd love to hear suggestions for what works for others who have found themselves in the same boat.

Thanks!

~MI

I think in some ways because we come to Paganism in general from other faiths there are periods of intense 'DING' moments, but unless you have dedicated yourself to a monastic lifestyle in which every moment revolves around producing ding moments, then there comes a point where day to day life and faith sort of blend together.

The expectation of religion to be endlessly new and exciting is kind of unreasonable.  The path you walk once your feet are planted and your eyes on the road isn't always going to be accompanied by fireworks.  That's where the commitment comes in.  Established practice does not equate stagnancy.  This is where the honeymoon versus day to day life resolves itself.  Faith also involves believing that god/z are not going to up and run off if we don't tether them to ourselves through ritual drama.  They don't need a new season of reality TV to keep ratings high.

I don't feel than I am in danger of becoming a 'lapsed pagan' should I not have an epiphany moment for a couple months.  Then all of a sudden the block breaks and flood waters come rushing in and I get to be considered unhinged by everyone who knows me until I find the ground again.

A plant that's kept growing year round without periods of dormancy and rest can drain itself, bringing a longer period of dormancy and even draining the root and dying.  You can bloom yourself to death.  Some plants even need a period of frost in order to bloom.  No freeze = no fruit.

You can force 'ding' but the drain on the rest of your life sometimes isn't worth it. 

Happy new year to ye.  I think this is actually sort of a ding for me.


MOdified to add after finishing the thread.. I fifth or sixth or whatever we're at by here.

[Didgeridoo]

I can sympathize. I have a genetic digestion problem so my life sometime feels like a constant stomach bug. So my heart goes out to you on that.

But kinda like everyone else, I think now might be a time to rest and let things process. But I'll be a little more specific. When I find that I've drown myself in a topic I stop getting the connection, the zing so to speak. I'll hit phases where I will read everything I can get my hands on about a single subject, listen to music that reminds of it (often the same few cds), etc, etc... After a short time, the subject becomes mundane because I'm swamped in it. I personally find that if I set it all down and read something else, listen to different music, go different places, it all refreshes. And then next time I learn a little more moderation. (Or at least, I *should* learn more moderation.) If you have studied yourself silly on Brigid, change modes. Read about something else that interests you for a little while. Rediscover something you like to do. Something to change the pace.

And like everyone else already said. Spend sometime getting well. Good health makes life a few million times easier.

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