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Author Topic: Dreams and waking up exhausted...  (Read 5092 times)
Mandi
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Did the big meanies break yer speshulness

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« Topic Start: April 01, 2007, 09:05:47 am »

I can't take much more of this.  I wake up tired every morning because of dreams that are so vivid - in which I'm WORKING that I wake up mentally and physically exhausted.

Last night I dreamt I was supposed to be going out for dinner, drinks and to a concert with hubbs (well in my dreams anyway) but at the last minute I had four additional kids under 6 dropped on me, and I was responsible for their feeding, care and entertainment.  Hubbs suggested leaving them at the house, and going anyways, but it was in his sarcastic 'presenting a non-option just to be a to be a PITA' voice.

So our who wonderful night out was wrecked by masses of kids.  He spent the night annoyed and impatient, I spent the night miserable and running my butt off taking care of kids.  Other friends who were supposed to be going with us went without us.

Then my neighbors - the ones I can't stand but hang out with anyways, told me they were moving in with me.  I was cleaning out my cabinets, in the middle of watching kids, so she would have somewhere to put her dishes.

Then parents started coming to pick up their kids, and I had to sort through all the crafts we'd done, (there was 3) and make sure everyone had theirs when they left.  One kid almost left without his name tag, and I spent a good long while flipping through stacks of name tags, all with readable information.  What school bus, allergies, first and last name and parents emergency contact.  Velly velly strange.

Then hubbs woke me up to say god morning.(irl)  I fell back asleep and started dreaming about putting away groceries.  Sorting chocolate chip cookies, from oatmeal.  At which I woke myself up to tell him that I was doing it again.  Working in my sleep.  The chocolate chip cookies being in the wrong kind of package is what woke me up.  Chip ahoy bags are not clear.  Otherwise I would have thought I had gotten up and gone downstairs and started my day.

I try to dream about more recreational things, but they show up as backdrop.  I told myself I would dream about roses, and relaxing; but the roses were outside the window of a house that was 'mine', and new in the dream but totally different than the house I live in.  I was sitting in a chain straining to see if they were blooming outside the window from a chair while I was hiding from the kids in a semi dark bedroom, where I was so tired in my dream, that I almost fell asleep.

Then I got up to go help my neighbor move her dishes.

Gah.  I'm beat, and I have to get through the DAY, not just the night.
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I'm gonna tell my son to join a circus so that death is cheap
And games are just another way of life
And I'm gonna tell my son to be a prophet of mistakes
Because for every truth there are half a million lies
And I'm gonna lock my son up in a tower
Till he learns to let his hair down far enough to climb outside.
-LIz Pahir

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Tana
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« Reply #1: April 01, 2007, 01:55:34 pm »

I know such nights too.
You wake up and think it all had been live.

So...though I believe the only one who can figure out what a dream really means is the dreamer, something is coming to my mind at once.

Do you have a responsibility you don't want to take? Something that is forced upon you?
(Like hanging out with neighbours you don't like?) So this is invading your dreams, maybe?

I also had dreams within I felt so tired, I almost couldn't keep my eyes open.
Usually in times when things irl got just too much.

This is maybe a hint (quite a clear one) that you should make space in your life for the things you want. Not the things you ought to do. But still, the only one who can answer this, is you Smiley
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RandallS
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« Reply #2: April 01, 2007, 05:56:44 pm »

I can't take much more of this.  I wake up tired every morning because of dreams that are so vivid - in which I'm WORKING that I wake up mentally and physically exhausted.

It sounds like you need a dreamcatcher.
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« Reply #3: April 02, 2007, 12:38:05 am »

I can't take much more of this.  I wake up tired every morning because of dreams that are so vivid - in which I'm WORKING that I wake up mentally and physically exhausted.
Ye gods and little fishes!  Sounds to me like you've got some major stress going on in your (waking) life.  Possibly involving a deep sense of being out of control - those dreams are full of trying to assert control and failing.

Don't take that as exact; take the concepts I've thrown out, juggle them around, see if it gives you any leads.  As Tana pointed out, ultimately the dreamer is the only one who can pinpoint what's happening in their head; others can't do more than facilitate the process.

Randall's suggestion of a dreamcatcher is an excellent one (there's an energy difference between any ol' dreamcatcher, and a properly charged one - immediately evident when I first saw my not-hubby's which was charged - but I don't know anything about how to do that), but I think you'll need to dig out the source of the problem, too, to get this dealt with.

Sunflower
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MojoDiva
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« Reply #4: April 02, 2007, 02:42:59 am »

Hrrrmmm....

Advice you don't have to take:  nix the neighbor.  If you don't like them, why o why are you taking your precious time to be with them? I have a sneaking suspicion that you have a hard time telling people "no." when asked to do things. I say this because in your dream, you are set to go out, but parents show up and 'dump the kids on ya and you go along with it.  Another interesting detail is you do not mention hubbs helping you in this scenario, just that he's annoyed and impatient. Do you secretly feel he isn't helping you enough in the home or you'd like him to help you more with your daycare stuff?  Is he critical of the time you spend working or has complained you don't have enough time with each other?

I think you may be feeling as if you have too much on your shoulders. Which is why the neighbor MUST go... don't be afraid to be honest that your time is going to be focused on your family and that you are unavailable to help this person out (not to mention how much hanging out with someone you don't necesssarily like can bring negativity into your life).  Eliminate the responsibilities of this neighbor and you will create a bit of space for yourself.

Then look at your business (Im assuming you run a home daycare based on the dream- I used to run one too!). Do you have too many kids? Would dropping one lessen the load?  Are you thinking about changing gears and doing something differant completely?

Sorry if Im way off base...just trying to throw stuff out there.

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Mandi
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« Reply #5: April 02, 2007, 07:45:11 am »

A bit of all of the above.  I'm going to go general rather than post by post replies because everybody seems to be generally on the same page. 

No daycare center, just two really rammy boys, teaching two kindergarten spanish classes a week and registering for school to teach kids and summer classes start soon.  My life and house are very kid centric. 

We're also starting to do a parents date night once a week, which is something we've never done before.  I'm sort of stressed about the dropping off and picking up thing, and in between trying to go out and have a good time, but on one hand worrying about being on time to pick up the kids, or being available if they need something.

I think in the dream the rub of the whole thing, was that I WANTED to be with him, but like others have said, saying no; is tough.  The crux there felt like I was having to choose between between.  Don't get me wrong, I definitely don't want the kids with us on the official third date night ever.

I'm not sure if the hubbs related frustration was with him/ at him/ projected onto him.  Since he wasn't really around in the dream except for the moments I was the most frustrated, I think he might represent my voice when I want to say no, want to gratify self, but can't.  There were other people around.  I could have handed them the kids and the crafts and walked out at any point, but for some reason every time I was about to walk, the four-5 other adults disappeared, and hubbs showed up frustrated that I "wasn't ready yet"

I don't think I would have let him help anyways.  I do have a tendency to be very *If you want a job done right, you have to do it yourself* at times.

I think my neighbors are just too close.  The ones that I try to get along with, or at least am not outrightly snarky to live less than a golf course green away across a sidewalk.  Great houses, no yard.  The neighbor that I am deliberately snarky to, lives less than fifteen feet away to my left.  I dreamt I was sharing a garage with her last night, and that was awful. 

I'm avoiding the neighbors I've mentioned before - we used to call them the blonde people or the barbie boat people so I guess I'm back to that, since at least it puts the thought of some distance between things.  I might take some steps to shield my house.  The crossover space, energy wise is creating a lot of static that's making me nuts.

I already have some carved stones in my garden.  I think I'm going to look for some other more crystally ones to charge and set on the corners of the house as well.  Something to demarcate energy wise.

Thanks all, I'm considering the dream catcher.  We have a few of them downstairs, but they are purely ornamental in purpose.  Some made, some bought.  I might have to go look for something more specific.  For some reason I don't think my own handiwork will do in this case.
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I'm gonna tell my son to join a circus so that death is cheap
And games are just another way of life
And I'm gonna tell my son to be a prophet of mistakes
Because for every truth there are half a million lies
And I'm gonna lock my son up in a tower
Till he learns to let his hair down far enough to climb outside.
-LIz Pahir
kaylar
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« Reply #6: April 02, 2007, 07:08:43 pm »

Hi Mandi!
I know exactly what happened to you, for it happened to me
when I tried to be superwoman.  I was 'working' all night,
'working' all day. 

Well, I burnt out.
And I realised it.

So I disappeared for two weeks.  I bought a water colour set
and just painted. 

I realised nothing is urgent, nothing is important, and other
people can actually function without me!  Imagine that!

After that experience, I built a lot of 'vacations' into my
schedule.  Absolutely free days.  And then, everything
was just perfect.
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« Reply #7: April 04, 2007, 11:22:04 am »


Randall's suggestion of a dreamcatcher is an excellent one (there's an energy difference between any ol' dreamcatcher, and a properly charged one - immediately evident when I first saw my not-hubby's which was charged - but I don't know anything about how to do that),
Sunflower
Any chance of asking him for any comments about that?
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SunflowerP
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« Reply #8: April 06, 2007, 07:12:36 pm »

Any chance of asking him for any comments about that?
He doesn't know either; I asked him about that when I first noticed.  It was a gift (from some member of his family, I think his mom but I'm not sure); my guess would be the charging wasn't anything the giver did consciously.  I got, not sure why, the impression that he was really not-keen on me asking, so I didn't, but that could just be that he really doesn't care much for this whole thing about having to ask or tell (he's more comfortable with just knowing - which he can do almost well enough to support his attitude, but I need words and talking).  For that matter, it wouldn't surprise me one bit if not-hubby's subconscious did it without telling him.

I dunno if there's actually anything profoundly esoteric about it - probably the main reasons most dreamcatchers are uncharged is because a) they're mainly decorational, all newage/multicultural cool, b) the owner supposes the object itself, or the pattern it forms, innately does the job (I think this is partly true of the pattern), c) the owner assumes that of course the pure and wise native folks who made it would have charged it, or d) without being in any way silly about it, it just never occurs to the owner - I hadn't given the matter any thought either way until I saw not-hubby's.  Could just be a matter of a little dedicatory intent.

Sunflower
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I do so have a life.  I just live part of it online.
“Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others
to live as one wishes to live.” - Oscar Wilde
My blog "If You Ain't Makin' Waves, You Ain't Kickin' Hard Enough", at Dreamwidth and LJ
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« Reply #9: April 06, 2007, 11:30:51 pm »

He doesn't know either; I asked him about that when I first noticed.  It was a gift (from some member of his family, I think his mom but I'm not sure)

Could it have been made specifically by or for the giver?  The reason I ask is that I have a very old, seriously charged spirit catcher.  It was made by an recent Ancestor of a friend of mine.  He hunted the fox specifically for this purpose, did all ceremony over it, and made the catcher using the facial fur of the fox.  It is a little creepy, especially to current sensibilities, but extremely powerful.

My friend inherited it, but her family is Catholic (as a lot of the local FN are).  She appreciates my path even though she doesn't follow it and she offered it to me as an inheritance of shared ancestry, since we are distantly related through our mothers.  It didn't appear to object to the transfer, and I've had it for several years now, with no sign of it's power diminishing.

So if your not hubby's dream catcher was made by or for his mother, it could carry the same kind of charge.  I realize dream catchers and spirit catchers aren't exactly the same thing, but the theory and the making are similar, so perhaps the charging is as well?

Absent
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« Reply #10: April 07, 2007, 12:35:17 pm »

my guess would be the charging wasn't anything the giver did consciously.  I got, not sure why, the impression that he was really not-keen on me asking, so I didn't,

 Could just be a matter of a little dedicatory intent.
Sunflower

Thanks anyway - I was just curious because once upon a time I used to collect dreamcatchers, just because I like them, had a whole forest of them, but then when I left my old life I only brought one with me, and the thread started me thinking that it hadn't been a conscious decision as to which one I brought with me, it just had to be the one that I have now.... even though it wasn't the prettiest or the best looking or anything. But it is the one with the blue bear on it. You don't want to know lol

Quote
but that could just be that he really doesn't care much for this whole thing about having to ask or tell (he's more comfortable with just knowing - which he can do almost well enough to support his attitude, but I need words and talking). 

OT but that sounds very like the way things are here sometimes... except that I'm the one who has trouble, big trouble actually although I'm working on it, with the talking/telling part, much to the occasional irritation of my beloved. It's not that I don't want to tell him things, just that after years and years in a bad relationship and not being able to tell/talk about stuff... it's really hard to get the words out... literally it physically stresses me out sometimes... even though now there's no need for it to affect me like that.... *sighs*.. I'm working on it, and luckily he's a very patient man lol
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