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Author Topic: Worst Spell Poetry  (Read 8509 times)
Waldfrau
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« Topic Start: September 30, 2008, 07:34:46 am »

You can give us all a laugh with cheesy love spells out of your teenage BOS? Any abysmal spell drafts in your paper bucket?

Or you've written some bad examples just for fun?

Maybe you want to nominate any spells from the net, books, serials or movies which weren't according to your lyrical taste?

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« Reply #1: September 30, 2008, 07:52:03 am »

Maybe you want to nominate any spells from the net, books, serials or movies which weren't according to your lyrical taste?

From a lust spell taught in a sex magick class long ago in San Antonio:

I'm a god and you're a goddess,
So we will fuck, oh my goodness.

I can't remember the rest of it, but it was not much better.
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« Reply #2: September 30, 2008, 08:28:32 am »

You can give us all a laugh with cheesy love spells out of your teenage BOS? Any abysmal spell drafts in your paper bucket?

Or you've written some bad examples just for fun?

Maybe you want to nominate any spells from the net, books, serials or movies which weren't according to your lyrical taste?

There were quite a number of them from Charmed.  Unfortunately, I can't find a list of them so I would know which specific ones are bad Undecided

And the ones that I can remember are okay from a poetic standpoint.
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Waldfrau
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« Reply #3: September 30, 2008, 08:31:32 am »

From a lust spell taught in a sex magick class long ago in San Antonio:

I'm a god and you're a goddess,
So we will fuck, oh my goodness.

I can't remember the rest of it, but it was not much better.
Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy Gosh! Are you kidding?!! Glad I didn't have a cup of coffee in my hands...
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Waldfrau
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« Reply #4: September 30, 2008, 08:32:03 am »

There were quite a number of them from Charmed.  Unfortunately, I can't find a list of them so I would know which specific ones are bad Undecided

And the ones that I can remember are okay from a poetic standpoint.
Believe me, in the German translation they weren't...
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« Reply #5: September 30, 2008, 08:48:23 am »

Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy Gosh! Are you kidding?!!

I'm not kidding. This was from one of the spells on a handout given to those attending the class. As I recall, the rest was equally awful but not as nearly memorable.
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« Reply #6: September 30, 2008, 08:55:51 am »

Believe me, in the German translation they weren't...

I just found a clip on youtube that has a bunch of them.  Some better than others.  How bad were they in German?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TSynqeOaRto
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« Reply #7: September 30, 2008, 09:24:00 am »

I just found a clip on youtube that has a bunch of them.  Some better than others.  How bad were they in German?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TSynqeOaRto

And I found a few more that I think are atrocious.

Seduction Spell

And from the same episode:

Love Spell
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« Reply #8: September 30, 2008, 12:25:45 pm »

Believe me, in the German translation they weren't...

Lol, I hadn't thought of that before. In English they were, poetically, pretty decent, but I can't imagine what they would sound like in German!
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« Reply #9: October 01, 2008, 11:57:48 am »

I just found a clip on youtube that has a bunch of them.  Some better than others.  How bad were they in German?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TSynqeOaRto
I think they were worse, because for one reason it's hard to translate rhymes at it is. But the more aparant reason is that in the German synchronisation they were spoken like it was a parody. In the English original the 'witches' seem to take their spells serious at least when they speak them. Parody and bad translations are quite typical of German synchronisations (and TV) in some shows. Often fantasy or sci-fi shows like this aren't taken serious (well, I can't blame them that much considering 'Charmed'), so the translation is done careless (plus there's the matter of tight schedule in TV).

It's not the first US-show I've seen bad synchronisations of. I've seen some weird mistranslations in Star Trek for example. (Not to mention that a conservative program did censor the episode where Spock was horny because they considered the show kid's TV in the 70ies or 80ies...)

I wonder if there's an issue of fantasy and sci-fi not having the same status in German literature & TV as it has in the UK or US. There isn't much of a German (original) fantasy or sci-fi book market apart from children's literature and imports from the UK or US for example. I'm no expert and just guessing though, maybe someone here knows more about it?
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« Reply #10: October 02, 2008, 03:48:40 pm »

I wonder if there's an issue of fantasy and sci-fi not having the same status in German literature & TV as it has in the UK or US. There isn't much of a German (original) fantasy or sci-fi book market apart from children's literature and imports from the UK or US for example. I'm no expert and just guessing though, maybe someone here knows more about it?

I don't think the problem is unique to German; Japanese shows dubbed into English have (or used to have) a reputation for bad translations, third-rate voice actors, and censorship. It's gotten better recently as the market has expanded, but most fans still prefer to see the shows with subtitles.
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« Reply #11: October 02, 2008, 04:11:21 pm »

I don't think the problem is unique to German; Japanese shows dubbed into English have (or used to have) a reputation for bad translations, third-rate voice actors, and censorship. It's gotten better recently as the market has expanded, but most fans still prefer to see the shows with subtitles.

And a lot of people tend to think of anime as things for kids.  I can name a few anime series that I probably wouldn't show a kid (Blood+ being a prominent example).
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« Reply #12: October 02, 2008, 04:14:42 pm »

I wonder if there's an issue of fantasy and sci-fi not having the same status in German literature & TV as it has in the UK or US. There isn't much of a German (original) fantasy or sci-fi book market apart from children's literature and imports from the UK or US for example. I'm no expert and just guessing though, maybe someone here knows more about it?

In America at least, fantasy and sci-fi, while technically mainstream, does have a slight stigma of being rather nerdy.
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« Reply #13: October 02, 2008, 08:24:57 pm »

I wonder if there's an issue of fantasy and sci-fi not having the same status in German literature & TV as it has in the UK or US. There isn't much of a German (original) fantasy or sci-fi book market apart from children's literature and imports from the UK or US for example. I'm no expert and just guessing though, maybe someone here knows more about it?

That's also weird, because one of the BEST sci-fi novels in recent times that I've read - was German and translated into English.

And it creeped me the hell out.  Amazing.  I think it was called The Carpet Makers.  Something like that.  (seriously.  read that book.  AMAZING).
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« Reply #14: October 02, 2008, 09:17:17 pm »

And it creeped me the hell out.  Amazing.  I think it was called The Carpet Makers.  Something like that.  (seriously.  read that book.  AMAZING).

Oh, yes. That's fabulous.

(And _The Neverending Story_ is originally written in German, but admittedly that's seen as more of a children's book._)
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