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Author Topic: Male FlameTenders?  (Read 4620 times)
Dalaigh Eoghan
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« Topic Start: November 15, 2008, 01:10:07 am »

I don't know statistics or anything... but I was wondering how many males you know are FlameTenders?

Just to let you gals/guys(?) know... I talked with SunflowerP... It's a major possibility that I will be coming in as a Cill member, but me and Brighid are still talking at the moment... So feel free to offer up prayers because I do want to become one, but don't want to do it unless Brighid desires that I do it. It is Her flame after all and I would never want to step on Her foot, since She is my "big sis" as I call Her.

So, what do you think about male FlameTenders and how do you think it's possibly different, if there is any difference? Also, what would you advise a new FlameTender to do, other than keep constant communication with Brighid and keep the vows I make as a FlameTender?
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Aster Breo
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« Reply #1: November 15, 2008, 02:47:27 pm »


As I'm sure you already know if you've talked to Sunflower, we made a decision when forming the Cauldron Cill to include anyone interested in keeping Brighid's flame, regardless of gender.  We all understand that the original Keepers were women and that men were barred from that work, but, as a group we felt that this Cill should be inclusive.

I have no idea how many men are involved with keeping Brighid's flame.  There are cills all over the place, and some are women only and some are co-ed.  My personal opinion is that anyone who is called by Brighid can tend Her flame, whether within a cill or independently.  I really like being a part of the TC Cill, but I also tend the flame every single night, whether it's my shift or not, as part of my devotionals.  So, in a sense, I guess you could say I don't really need a cill.

I would advise a new flame tender to start reading and thinking, start talking (posting, emailing, chatting, whatever) with other flame tenders about their experiences, and look for ways to stay mindful of your relationship with Brighid all the time, not just when you remember to light a flame for Her.

If you decide to join the TC Cill, you will be welcome.
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Aster Breo
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« Reply #2: November 15, 2008, 02:53:28 pm »


I also meant to say that Ord Brighideach (http://ordbrighideach.org) has two exclusively male cills, in addition to the female and coed cills.  So obviously other men are called to be Flametenders.   Wink
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Dalaigh Eoghan
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« Reply #3: November 15, 2008, 02:54:17 pm »

I would advise a new flame tender to start reading and thinking, start talking (posting, emailing, chatting, whatever) with other flame tenders about their experiences, and look for ways to stay mindful of your relationship with Brighid all the time, not just when you remember to light a flame for Her.

I guess I'm off to a good start then. Wink The way I view it (and I guess I could thank my background in Christianity for this) is that Deity is to always be on our mind because since we are God/dess ourselves, we are connected to them in a deeper way than we sometimes realize. We don't have to be doing anything special just to think of them, but could and should look at the small things in our daily lives to show us what Deity is saying rather than just taking it all as coincidence.

If you decide to join the TC Cill, you will be welcome.

Thanks. Smiley So far it seems like me and Brighid are coming to a decision... I'll give it a few more days just to make sure, unless She decides to thwap me on the head or scream in my ears (which will really get my attention since I'm partially deaf.)  Cheesy So once the decision is finalized I will let you all know. Grin
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Dalaigh Eoghan
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« Reply #4: November 15, 2008, 02:56:31 pm »

I also meant to say that Ord Brighideach (http://ordbrighideach.org) has two exclusively male cills, in addition to the female and coed cills.  So obviously other men are called to be Flametenders.   Wink

Talk about confirmation! Tongue

I wouldn't mind if I was the only male flametender... As long as Brighid is satisfied. Smiley Although I'm sure I would probably fit in with all the women since my friends say I'm practically "one of the girls." Tongue
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SunflowerP
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« Reply #5: November 15, 2008, 11:31:03 pm »

I wouldn't mind if I was the only male flametender... As long as Brighid is satisfied. Smiley Although I'm sure I would probably fit in with all the women since my friends say I'm practically "one of the girls." Tongue
There are two males in the Cauldron Cill already - neither of them has posted on TC in quite a while, but they're still on the roster.  IIRC, one of them - Lailoken - has been in our Cill right from when we started.

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Dalaigh Eoghan
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« Reply #6: November 15, 2008, 11:48:11 pm »


That's cool... I hope they come back around so we can share stories of being male FlameTenders...
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dragonfaerie
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« Reply #7: November 20, 2008, 11:25:50 am »

So, what do you think about male FlameTenders and how do you think it's possibly different, if there is any difference? Also, what would you advise a new FlameTender to do, other than keep constant communication with Brighid and keep the vows I make as a FlameTender?

I think the Goddess calls those whom she calls, and I have no problems working with men in any of my magical or spiritual endeavors... even though I do have an interest in the feminist/women-only aspects of Goddess worship.

I also don't see much of an issue of men working with Brigit herself. Men can certainly be healers and bards. My husband is a medical assistant who'd like to become an RN (though he works with Egyptian gods, not Brigit). Like I said... She calls whom She calls.

It's been my experience that Brigit takes an active hand in guiding her priests and priestesses. I get a lot of subtle nudges... like feeling the urge to log in and catch up with the boards on my last few Cill shifts. Or getting urges to write down certain bits of poetry at odd times of the day or night. Her healing aspects have been really appreciated as I work through a difficult time in my life right now.

So my advice? Just listen. She'll tell you what she requires of you. And don't be afraid to push back a little when you need to. She's a demanding sort, and sometimes mundane needs are gonna have to come first.

Karen
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