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Author Topic: Totally wrong!  (Read 2664 times)
Sperran
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« Topic Start: December 15, 2008, 01:23:55 pm »

Have you ever done a divination and later found out you were totally wrong (e.g. misread what the cards really meant, scrying showed something completely untrue, etc.)?  Tell us about the times you really missed the mark.  Why do you think it happened?  What were the results?

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« Reply #1: December 15, 2008, 02:58:04 pm »


Yeah, I was at my friend's house after a concert a few years ago.  She was totally drunk and I was determined to do the reading.  The whole thing was completely wrong, even by my own standards, and I couldn't do tarot for years after that.  I suppose I over reacted to it, but I was really shaken by the possiblity of the *tarot* being wrong.  Uh, reality check.  It is a tool, not the all-knowning. 
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« Reply #2: December 15, 2008, 03:09:08 pm »

Have you ever done a divination and later found out you were totally wrong (e.g. misread what the cards really meant, scrying showed something completely untrue, etc.)?  Tell us about the times you really missed the mark.  Why do you think it happened?  What were the results?

Sperran

When I was in college, I did a lot of readings for people in the dorms.  One girl was not adjusting well and didn't know if she would stay in school, her focus etc weren't there.  Cards said she was failing her classes and her life would probably end up taking another direction.  Suffice to say, I was pretty shocked (as well as guilty and embarrassed) to see her around campus next semester.
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« Reply #3: December 15, 2008, 03:27:01 pm »

Have you ever done a divination and later found out you were totally wrong (e.g. misread what the cards really meant, scrying showed something completely untrue, etc.)?  Tell us about the times you really missed the mark.  Why do you think it happened?  What were the results?

Sperran

Since I usually not ask for the future per se or the dark, tall stranger *g* I can't give exact fails. But misreading, or better not understanding - yes, I'm afraid.

Esp. when I tried to clear a situation about work. It said 'ends' - 'ending' - 'end of circle' in almost all sets I used, but... I'm still stuck with that **** job... Don't know what I did wrong.

Oh and a major fail at an animal communication that showed me, I'm quite 'offline' at the moment, so I don't do cards at all for now.
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'You had to repay, good or bad. There was more than one type of obligation. That’s what people never really understood.….Things had to balance. You couldn’t set out to be a good witch or a bad witch. It never worked out for long. All you could try to be was a witch, as hard as you could.' Terry Pratchett 'Lords and Ladies'

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« Reply #4: December 15, 2008, 04:33:43 pm »

Have you ever done a divination and later found out you were totally wrong (e.g. misread what the cards really meant, scrying showed something completely untrue, etc.)?  Tell us about the times you really missed the mark.  Why do you think it happened?  What were the results?

Sperran

Many.  I may be a little harsh in how I judge a reading to be wrong, but I find it's better to dismiss things that just 'might could should' be twisted or stretched to fit (but realistically don't really) than to bend over backwards trying to justify a basic fail.

I think I blogged somewhere about reasons for failure, but basically it can be wrong time, wrong place, wrong question, resistance on the part of the reader or questioner, a case where knowing the answer will worsen the situation, an off day for the reader, a questioner who can't be read, assumptions getting in the way, lack of skill at interpretation - in short, a whole slew of reasons for a reading to be wrong.

The biggest mistake a reader can make, in my not so humble opinion, is to refuse to admit to being wrong, or to cast about for excuses.  I can usually tell, at least by the second or third attempt, when I'm simply not going to 'get' it, and ethically the only thing I can do is tell my client, end the session, and refund their money.  (and reschedule if they want to and if I think the situation might change)

I find doing this has sharpened my skills.  Being able to recognize and admit to wrongness helps me recognize when I'm right, even in subtle situations where the answer doesn't seem directly related to the question.  It is also good for my reputation, since clients know I won't string them along.  If I'm not getting anything for them then that's it.  No charge, try another time or another reader.

It can be confusing figuring out whether you are getting gibberish because of the situation, or whether the reading is a direct fail.  That's why I include a ghost card with all my decks - it cuts through some of the crap.  I put my fail rate at about 25-30%, which is fine as long as my recognition-of-fail rate keeps pace.  An inability to read something is only a big drama/trauma if you waste all your energy trying to 'make' it fit.

Tell us about the times you really missed the mark.  Why do you think it happened?  What were the results?

Sperran

Wile I spend a lot of time thinking about the hows and whys of the failures and how to prevent them, the specific details of the readings themselves that were wrong don't stick with me the way the pattern does.  Failures with a kick stay with me, though.  It's kind of a pride thing:  I was wrong, but....

One of my epic failures was for my dh's sister in law when I first met her.  I gave her a year-ahead reading that was just lovely, pregnancy, birth of a son, new house and job, everything with a solid ring of truth and certainty to it and a ton of detail.  It all happened - to her sister.  This is one of my most common types of fail - true things but not for the client, - as well as reading in the wrong time frame, past as future or vice versa.


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« Reply #5: December 15, 2008, 05:47:44 pm »

Have you ever done a divination and later found out you were totally wrong (e.g. misread what the cards really meant, scrying showed something completely untrue, etc.)?  Tell us about the times you really missed the mark.  Why do you think it happened?  What were the results?

Almost every time I've been totally wrong it was either that I had too much of a vested interest in the outcome or because I wasn't mentally present for the reading. This is how I learned to let some other reader look anything I'm really interested in that looks to be either too good to be true, too bad to be true, or just really weird.
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« Reply #6: December 15, 2008, 07:13:08 pm »

Almost every time I've been totally wrong it was either that I had too much of a vested interest in the outcome or because I wasn't mentally present for the reading. This is how I learned to let some other reader look anything I'm really interested in that looks to be either too good to be true, too bad to be true, or just really weird.

That's been exactly my situation as well.  I've found I have a far better success rate when i read for anyone other than myself, because it is simply too easy for me to see what i want to see.
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« Reply #7: December 16, 2008, 05:22:25 pm »

What Marilyn said - in general, not (of course) about specifics.  I hadn't answered before because I really didn't have more to say than, "Probably lots, but no specific instances come to mind."

But her response also helped me refocus on the question from a slightly different angle.  I find the practice some professional divinationists have, of citing a precise-percentage-figure success rate, offputting:  how the heck does one quantify that?  Too many variables, too many subjective elements, and the temptation to "bash to fit" to maintain a success rate that looks good in one's promotional material.  (I've an idea that percentage-citing may be expected in some culturally-linked traditions of how divination is done - I'm not sneering at that, but being skeptical of its application in instances where the cultural traditions don't pertain.)

I'm probably somewhat biased about it, because I'm not really a prognosticative reader - what I "get", when doing a reading, isn't usually predictions of events, but a picture of what personal resources (character traits and such) the querent possesses for dealing with events.  So I can't measure success in terms of whether something I predicted "came true"; success, for me, centres on whether the reading was useful to the querent.  I've had instances where I was simply unable to find a useful correlation between the cards and the patterns of the querent's life, which I'd count as a "failed reading", but wouldn't usually think to describe as "being wrong".

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« Reply #8: December 16, 2008, 09:44:59 pm »

I find the practice some professional divinationists have, of citing a precise-percentage-figure success rate, offputting:  how the heck does one quantify that?  Too many variables, too many subjective elements, and the temptation to "bash to fit" to maintain a success rate that looks good in one's promotional material.

Surprisingly (or maybe not Cheesy) I agree with you here.  Percentages are too easily skewed, spun, and made up.  Depending on time frame, my fail rate could be 80-90 rather than 25-30.  In fact it was almost that high in the months leading up to my mother's death, partly because I was just not capable of detaching myself enough to not have my own shit come through, and partly because I did very few readings in that time, and so did not have a good enough sample size to judge from.

The percentage I gave was from a quick estimate of refunds given in the rush of Halloween parties I wound up doing, and vaguer memories of prior years' grad, Halloween, and New Year's (my big times for tarot parties) parties.  That has remained a constant for a couple of decades.  One person per ten-person party who gets a refund, plus one or two who won't take one but who I think really should.  They tend to fall at the end of the line, which probably means I should cut down on the number of querents allowed per party.

Individual sessions don't have as many fails.  Partly this is because of the length and depth of the sessions and partly because those readings tend to be more like the ones you describe.  People are interested in examining their situations, not just in 'getting their fortunes told'.

At any rate, while I find estimates like that good for tracking myself, I see them more as 'fail rates' than 'success rates', if you see what I mean.  I don't think I would put them on promotional material, but then again I don't have any such material.

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« Last Edit: December 16, 2008, 09:47:32 pm by Marilyn (ABSENTMINDED) » Logged

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Blessed are the cracked, for it is they who let in the light.

Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack, a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in

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« Reply #9: December 16, 2008, 10:39:06 pm »

That's been exactly my situation as well.  I've found I have a far better success rate when i read for anyone other than myself, because it is simply too easy for me to see what i want to see.

yeppers. Especially in relationship matters, I have a humongous fail rate in reading the cards for myself. Undecided I Ching works better for that. With other people, as has been mentioned, it depends a lot on my own mental/emotional state, and my personal investment in the outcome.
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« Reply #10: December 17, 2008, 11:32:11 pm »

Surprisingly (or maybe not Cheesy) I agree with you here.
Not at all surprising.  I have nothing at all against making approximations for one's own edification (which may also come up when "talking shop" with a fellow reader, or give one something to say when an individual querent explicitly asks).  But when a percentage figure is quite high, too precise, and used for promotion ("Madam Zora's readings are 89% accurate!"), it smacks of, "if we make it sound 'scientific' more people will buy it."

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