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Author Topic: The Craft - Getting over uneasiness?  (Read 3919 times)
experimentation626
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« Reply #11: March 11, 2009, 02:51:50 pm »

Do you ever feel uneasy, or silly, when you work with tools, and chants?

I've found that the more complicated the ritual is, the more foolish I feel - I lose my tempo, my voice cracks, my arms move stiltedly, and basically I feel like a kid playing dress-up. It's worse if I'm in a group setting and there are other people who are clearly getting more out of the ritual than I am, because then I start feeling like I'm really doing something wrong to not be experiencing whatever it is they are.

I've also found that familiarity eases those feelings; after doing one type of full moon ritual over the course of a year, I was finally at ease enough with what I was doing to sense the energy raised and collected. I stopped struggling to remember each step and I learned to enter a mental state that allows me to 'forget' that the aspects of ritual, taken out of context, can sometimes look silly and goofy.

Feeling goofy, though, can distract you from the fact that what you're doing actually works. I will never forget the first circle I cast, reading aloud from a book as I walked 'round my room. I felt a little foolish doing it, but the sense of uncharacteristic calm that I experienced once I stood in the center of the circle could not be denied. I remember being torn by the sheer absurdity of the silly playacting, and the very real sense of peace I felt.
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