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Author Topic: Finding the Right Path  (Read 3554 times)
Scarlet
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« Topic Start: March 12, 2009, 01:54:33 am »

I started reading books about witchcraft at a very young age. Most influences were wicca studies. I found a teacher around 15 learned some very important things about Hermetics and then I lost touch with him. Other than that, a few open circles at a local store and I really haven't had much of a group or anyone to really discuss. So, I'm going to be pretty honest here about me, my feelings and what I went through. I'm thinking maybe it will help you understand my thoughts. I hope you'll read and help, but not mock or ridicule me. I not stupid but I think due to my lack of interaction I am not knowledgable about some things.

About 10 years into my practice something traumatic occurred in my life. I had left an abusive relationship. I was also with a child. I did everything legally possible to keep him away. But I wanted to do something more to keep myself and my son safe. Everyone told me no no no, no the Rede states, you can only protect no defense. Then I met someone who followed the Strega path. She said you can defend yourself and your child. Make him leave, keep him away. But, in my head, what I thought meant to keep him away was to 'control' him, which was a no no. Cause to do a spell on another I have to ask permission. It really tore me apart. What I thought I understood, what I thought I knew and I was pretty confused. I took a step away from my beliefs my practices because the notion of harm none caused a lot of inner conflict. I didn't know what it meant exactly. I think a lot of this came from not having a community to learn from or even others to speak to that I trusted. But, I had enough. He was an abuser, drug addict, theif and you name it he probably did it. It came to a point where it felt like me in a boxing ring always putting up my hands to block from being punched, but never ever fighting back. It felt ridiculous. I did a spell to keep us safe and accepted the responsibility for whatever karmic return I'd get x3.

I found this place recently and even though I've only been here a couple of days I'm feeling pretty comfortable. And this is why I decided to be honest and reach out. I'm in a position where I'm questioning if the wiccan path is really for me or maybe I need to confirm that it is the right path. I finally started really looking on the web and at bookstores and I see there's so much more information out there than before. I really feel like I just stepped into the world. The thing is there's a lot of good things out there and a lot of crap. Also I have no idea where to start.  The Green, Hedge, Cottage and Kitchen paths sounds good. I've gotten some good suggestions on books, thank you. But, there's so much out there.

With all the different paths, where do you begin this reevaluation? I'm very much comfortable working with energies, healing, herbs, candles, earth, nature. But, there's something about the formal rituals I enjoy. I have this strong interest in the Qabalah and I want to learn more. I would also like to get more information on Hermetics. So, with my strengths are the paths I'm currently looking at heading me in the direction of my interests? If not can you offer me some suggestions? Or give me more questions to how to narrow down my focus of study?

About with what happened with me in my past. Maybe others don't go through a similar inner conflict. I know I was young. But, I'm curious with your beliefs how would you have dealt with the issue.  If you feel strongly that I did something wrong, I kindly ask that you refrain from scolding me. I'm looking to move forward and grow.

Thank you.
Scarlet
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SunflowerP
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« Reply #1: March 12, 2009, 05:53:36 am »

About with what happened with me in my past. Maybe others don't go through a similar inner conflict. I know I was young. But, I'm curious with your beliefs how would you have dealt with the issue.  If you feel strongly that I did something wrong, I kindly ask that you refrain from scolding me. I'm looking to move forward and grow.
As a Rede-follower myself, I see nothing to scold you about.  Now, if one of those folks who claim the Rede "states" that even defense of self/others constitutes doing harm happened to come along, they'd get an earful (and not just from me, either).

I can't tell from what you've said whether you're questioning whether a Wiccish path will suit you because of that pernicious and irresponsible interpretation of the Rede, or if there are other reasons.  If the latter, my best suggestion is, keep reading - you won't necessarily find what suits you this week, or even this year; the journey of discovery itself is part of your personal path.  But don't dismiss the Wiccish merely because some people are intent on interpreting the Rede so that they never have to feel guilty about their own cowardice; it's not an authorative interpretation by any means, nor even the most common.

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Scarlet
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« Reply #2: March 12, 2009, 11:47:00 am »

I can't tell from what you've said whether you're questioning whether a Wiccish path will suit you because of that pernicious and irresponsible interpretation of the Rede, or if there are other reasons.  If the latter, my best suggestion is, keep reading...

No, I'm not dismissing Wicca. The point about me sharing my past is really sharing my ignorance. The reason why I wanted feedback on my past and what others would have done is to learn a little bit more about my misunderstandings. Maybe that was a wrong way to state it. I don't know. I figured to start moving forward in my studies I needed to have better understanding of somethings that confused me and just be honest with what had occured.

...- you won't necessarily find what suits you this week, or even this year; the journey of discovery itself is part of your personal path.  But don't dismiss the Wiccish merely because some people are intent on interpreting the Rede so that they never have to feel guilty about their own cowardice; it's not an authorative interpretation by any means, nor even the most common.

I guess I feel as though I'm starting over and a bit lost. And maybe a step in the right direction can help. You're right and I know I'm not going to find it this next week or even in a year. That's why I want to learn about other paths, mainly those focused on my interests, to help me in my journey. It may lead me back to Wicca. I may find after all this, Wicca is truely my path and my belief stronger. I just think here, I'd get more help and assistance than I have before. I like the point of discussion and people asking questions and making good points. It helps. Your post helps.


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GoldenGryffe
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« Reply #3: March 13, 2009, 08:07:40 am »


Just based on the fact you're wondering if you should stay with Wicca, I'd suggest http://wicca.timerift.net/ - I found this while browsing around in some of my searches, and it dispelled a lot of misconceptions I'd had about Wicca. (And actually has me wondering if it's for me.) If you find it honestly doesn't appeal to you, maybe you should list out what you believe and what you're looking for, then see if anyone here has heard of something along the same lines. If you know of an occult shop nearby, you could probably ask if they have any resources too. The one I visit sometimes is owned by a very friendly and generally awesome shaman, and he's helped me find stuff to read or think about many times. Smiley

Also, keep in mind that you may not find a formal path. Maybe eclectic is for you. And nothing says you can't keep learning about other paths or things that interest you.

(((Scarlet)))
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Maythe
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« Reply #4: March 15, 2009, 06:23:22 am »



These two discussions of the Rede might be useful...

http://www.ecauldron.net/opedrede.php
http://www.ecauldron.net/forum/index.php?topic=7139.0

For what it's worth (I'm not Wiccan) I think everyone has the right to defend themselves and can't see how you did anything wrong.
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RandallS
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« Reply #5: March 15, 2009, 08:34:06 am »

About 10 years into my practice something traumatic occurred in my life. I had left an abusive relationship. I was also with a child. I did everything legally possible to keep him away. But I wanted to do something more to keep myself and my son safe. Everyone told me no no no, no the Rede states, you can only protect no defense. Then I met someone who followed the Strega path. She said you can defend yourself and your child. Make him leave, keep him away.

She was right. The Rede only say that if what you want to do does not harm others, it is definitely okay to do it. It doesn't say anything at all about what to do if if what you want to do will harm others -- as that requires JUDGMENT, not a pithy saying.  Besides, even if you come from the Neo-Wiccan branch that believes the Wiccan Rede is a moral law that says you should not cause harm at all, it does not help. By acting to protect yourself, you cause harm. By not acting to protect yourself, you cause harm by allowing harm to yourself or others that you had the power to prevent. You end up breaking the "harm none" moral law no matter what you do.

This is why "cause harm to none" is bad moral law -- it is impossible to exist without every action you take causing harm to some creature.
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MichelleA
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« Reply #6: March 15, 2009, 12:23:34 pm »

Scarlet,

First of all, no judgement.  That's not my place.  We all do what we need to do at the time, later on if the situation presents again, we can do differently if needed.

Witchcraft has been a 'calling' with me for a very long time.  I didn't answer that call because all I could see was wicca and I'm not wiccan.  Nothing wrong with wiccan if that is your path, but it is not mine and never was meant to be.  It took me a very long time to find the path in witchcraft that is right for me.  My path does not involve ritual, laws, redes or specific deity of any kind.  For me, its just a tool at my disposal.  If I want to, I will curse or hex.  I see nothing wrong with doing so.  That is part of my path.  Do I do so because I'm having a bad day?  Nope.  Do I do so because someone has been arrogant and judgemental of me and gotten under my skin?  Nope.  I do see it as a serious act, but I won't cut it out of my life or practice simply because its a 'not nice' thing to do.

I can't tell you exactly how I came to this path.  I just know for as long as I can remember I've been an origin or 'truth' seeker.  That's not meant to be a value judgement.  For me, I try to get back to the origin of things, its core essence, before myth, ritual, tradition, etc became added to it.  I looked back to what I knew of life in the bronze/iron ages.  What might their attitudes to magic be?  How might they deal with something?  True, we don't live in the same world today, but that doesn't mean the essence of the thing isn't still valid.  I tend to believe the simple is off then the best answer anyway.  For me, this answered a lot of queries I had about ritual, tools, beliefs around today.  This felt right for me and still does.  I don't suggest this is the way you should go about questioning things, I simply offer it as an example of how I did it.
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« Reply #7: March 15, 2009, 01:37:35 pm »


MichelleA,

Could you please leave the quote code in when you respond to a thread?  Thank you.

EverFool
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