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Author Topic: Chronic Mental Illness  (Read 25803 times)
tinapo85
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« Reply #45: March 17, 2010, 02:15:56 pm »

I am sorry Tinapo. I hope that you get al the support that you need to help you deal with all this. If there is anything that I can do, please ask. You can pm or email me if you want to.

Thanks so much. I will if I need more support I will.

I went to my first visit today, and it was pretty good, but they think i may be bipolar and have ADHD. Who knew?

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« Reply #46: March 17, 2010, 09:14:15 pm »

Thanks so much. I will if I need more support I will.

I went to my first visit today, and it was pretty good, but they think i may be bipolar and have ADHD. Who knew?



Yay for the Bipolar ADHD clusterf*ck!  I know all about that.  The tricky thing for me is trying to determine whether I can't sit still because of ADHD or hypomania.  At the end of the day I tend to think what matters isn't even diagnosis but which drugs work.

My doctor put me on very, very, very small doses of adderol, because he was worried that larger doses would make me manic.  I always try to shy away from giving anything that might resemble medical advice, but I do hope your doctor is careful with the stuff.   Undecided

Ditto on the "let me know if you need anything" sentiment.  I hope things get better for you.
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« Reply #47: March 20, 2010, 06:09:41 am »

Folks like this sound just like the Fundie Christians who believe that all problems (medical, financial, family, etc.) are all caused by being "not right with God" and that the only really solution to problems is to "get right with God."  It's no less silly just because it comes from a Pagan or a New Age point-of-view.
That kind of attitude I encountered a lot more in Pagans than in Christians. (That's because the Christian spectrum in Germany has a much different destribution than the one in the US.) It annoys me endlessly to get patronizing advice about my personality development from people, who think of themselves as more illuminated than me and don't know anything about my backround. They wouldn't even ask why I had this and that "problem" (not that I wanted to tell them), they just assume that I'm not ready for the big spiritual wisdom and have to work on myself.

I'm not saying it's completly wrong, of course spirituality and personal development are intertwined. But I hate that one-dimensional approach assuming that everyone having any kind of problems isn't grown up or illuminated enough.

And generally considering what I read in this thread I realize how very lucky I am. I've never needed to take any psycho meds. I've had a situational depression a few years ago. I struggle with various mild "problems" since I'm kindergarten age because my mom was raised in a Catholic orphanage and passed on a lot of shit she got from there. I also experienced a lot of mobbing and violence. So I have some PTSD symptoms - which got never diagnosed as PTSD, partly because I wasn't able to talk about everything and the analytists weren't able to piece together the single symptoms to a larger picture. But I'm just reading about PTSD and stuff starts to fit together, plus I've started some exercise coming from imaginative-psychodynamic PTSD therapy and that really helps.

But finding out what the problem is and what helps was quite an oddyssea through a labyrinth. Spirituality helped me a lot to push through and find what I need...so I'm starting to think that I'm not any less strong or illuminated than anyone else. And any kind of patronizing spiritual advice going along the line that I have to develop my self trust or similar to advance my spiritual development is just f*ckingly short coming because you can't just swear to improve a specific part of yourself if you don't get a proper diagnosis and don't know which kind of work you need.

I don't have any patience any more with people who think they can help you by simple telling you to "work on yourself".
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« Reply #48: March 20, 2010, 06:11:20 am »

Good luck!
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« Reply #49: March 20, 2010, 08:24:03 am »

I'm not saying it's completly wrong, of course spirituality and personal development are intertwined. But I hate that one-dimensional approach assuming that everyone having any kind of problems isn't grown up or illuminated enough.

It's far more often wrong than right, IMHO. For example, I once heard some new ager covered with enough crystals to stock a store explain how someone with a bone disease caused by defective genes was stick because he did not truly want to get better and how if he would just quit giving in to the disease, he would be able to walk properly -- that his weak will was the problem not his genes. I wanted the shove the guy's crystal collection up his ass.
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Waldfrau
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« Reply #50: March 20, 2010, 02:08:35 pm »

It's far more often wrong than right, IMHO. For example, I once heard some new ager covered with enough crystals to stock a store explain how someone with a bone disease caused by defective genes was stick because he did not truly want to get better and how if he would just quit giving in to the disease, he would be able to walk properly -- that his weak will was the problem not his genes. I wanted the shove the guy's crystal collection up his ass.
Shocked Gosh, that's absurd!

It's even more obvious on a physical matter... I just wanted to say that even if it's a mental matter you often can't just 'change the way you think/look at the issue' although that might sound like a good advice on psychical problems for an outsider. And then that other empty phrase "you have to work on yourself".... I mean, of course everyone is changing by living and making new experiences and of course you can focus on developing a specific aspect on yourself, but what kind of advice is it to tell somebody to 'work on him/herself'?!?

I tried to 'work on myself' since I left the cradle because nobody in my family accepted me the way I am - and unlike everything they told me I wasn't born evil, sick or 'unnormal'. But some on the 'work on myself'-work did make an healthy person ill instead of doing the contrary because I did the wrong work. Of course we all have to learn...but it isn't simple a matter of 'working on yourself'. I don't quite like the connotation to the word 'work' in that context. I know it fits partly because it can be a rough ride and you sometimes have to do stuff that ain't fun, but it can be very misleading. I needed a lot to simply permit myself to enjoy life and stop working because usually I'm working till I can't anymore and then I'm thinking it's my fault that my life isn't improving because I'm working not enough...

It's the same assumption that any ill person is ill because of weakness, laziness or lack of knowledge/wisdom/illumination and that any sane/healthy people can give advice on how to master the problem because he/she doesn't have it - thus thinking he/she's immune to or above such problems due to her/his spiritual/intellectual/whatever superiority.

I really think it's just a matter of every person having her/his own problems and labyrinths to walk through.
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« Reply #51: March 20, 2010, 04:03:37 pm »


I think some people find victim-blaming easier than compassion.

After all, if it's their problem or karma or ill-thoughts or whatnot causing the problem, compassion won't help - so heck with them.

I hate it, but I see it .. a lot. Sad
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« Reply #52: March 21, 2010, 05:01:51 am »

I think some people find victim-blaming easier than compassion.

After all, if it's their problem or karma or ill-thoughts or whatnot causing the problem, compassion won't help - so heck with them.

I hate it, but I see it .. a lot. Sad

If you are blaming somebody else, it means that you don't have to spend any time or energy bothering yourself to care about it.

I don't agree with it. I think that it is one of the nastier things in life, but it seems to be how most people operate. Cry
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« Reply #53: March 21, 2010, 04:33:53 pm »

If you are blaming somebody else, it means that you don't have to spend any time or energy bothering yourself to care about it.

I don't agree with it. I think that it is one of the nastier things in life, but it seems to be how most people operate. Cry

I think there's also a real element of thinking that if victims did something to deserve it, and you don't do that thing, then you're safe. People get scared of things they can't control. It's not at all just mental illness, either; when people find something scary, they're likely to blame victims or their lifestyles so that they can feel safer because they don't do those things.

They're scared of cancer and heart disease, and you can't blame the victim for that, so they take vitamins, try fad diets, cut certain foods out of their diet, etc. They're scared of things like autism, so they'll do things like blame vaccines so that they can tell themselves that it won't happen to their kids because they never got their MMR and polio shots. They blame people with mental illnesses for "not trying hard enough" or "being too pessimistic," because it's hard to believe that your brain might start doing things you have absolutely no control over. They blame crime victims for being in the wrong areas, or associating with the wrong people, or dressing the wrong way, so that if they don't do those things, they don't have to worry about crime. They're scared of being homeless, or being victims of institutional oppression, so they blame homeless people or people in extreme poverty for not working hard enough or having too many kids or being lazy or etc., and blame people who are victims of hate for somehow provoking it by "playing the [oppression] card" or "being in people's faces."

Nothing's certain in life, and for a lot of people, that is really scary, and so they invent behaviors that attract bad fortune. Usually, these are behaviors they don't think they have or will ever have, so that they can feel completely safe; it's not going to happen to them, because they don't [insert behavior here].

This was what drove me, anyway. I was never vocal about it, and I did understand that mental illness is usually chemical or biological, but up until about a year ago, I just didn't "get" depression and anxiety. I understood the concept (that they were mental illnesses), but could get, at a gut level, why people couldn't just snap out of it. I always thought if people just stopped focusing on the negative and tried to see the positive, then they could overcome it somehow — and it would never happen to me, because I knew how to just look past the bad times and forward to the good.

Then I had about eight straight months of obsessive, intrusive and occasionally pretty disturbing thoughts (I've had intrusive thoughts before, but never obsessive for more than a day or two, and usually only for a couple hours until I found a distraction; my OCD had until lately always been mild except when I was stressed by stuff like finals, and very behavioral), leading to some major anxiety and mild but still life-altering depression, and now I get it. And I am really, really glad I'd never vocalized those thoughts* (except with friends, in the "What can we do to help cheer you up?" sort of way) because I have been getting it from people and it's really frustrating and just makes it even worse. Sad

Sorry, didn't mean to write a novel.

*EDIT: I really hope I didn't, anyway. I was not always good about thinking about what I say. Still not, sometimes.
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« Reply #54: March 21, 2010, 05:19:45 pm »

I have been diagnosed with PTSD, Major Depression, Schitzoaffective disorder, and Bipolar 2 (AKA recurrent depression). People generally don't want to discuss these disorders. I have hallucinations, severe physical pain, many memory problems, slurred speech, double vision, tremors, and other symptoms. All because I can't "Snap out of it"

Anyone here have any similiar issues?

My deepest sympathies.  I've only ever had trouble with depression, and it's been pretty mild.  However, all throughout my public education, I struggled with severe asthma-- the life-threatening kind.  My gym teachers were exceedingly poorly informed about asthma, and I remember that every time I collapsed, they would say something to the effect of "it's all in your head".  I nearly died when I was seventeen, and the teacher left me lying on the ground, all alone.  When people found me, they told me to calm down, like I wasn't already very calm, which I was.  I had to be, because if I panicked at that moment, I was going to die.  To this day, when I hear "it's all in your head", I still see red.  Ill-informed people are obnoxious.

I wish you the very best.
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« Reply #55: March 21, 2010, 06:41:35 pm »

I think there's also a real element of thinking that if victims did something to deserve it, and you don't do that thing, then you're safe. People get scared of things they can't control. It's not at all just mental illness, either; when people find something scary, they're likely to blame victims or their lifestyles so that they can feel safer because they don't do those things.
Exactly! I think there shouldn't be any blame in dealing with illness, because either way (blaming others or yourself) doesn't help and you possibly just feed a mental illness with more power. (I can't get out of this because I'm such a freak/ because xy has messed me up so badly.)

(On the legal aspect of course perpretrators of violence and abuse should be punished.)

Quote
I was never vocal about it, and I did understand that mental illness is usually chemical or biological, but up until about a year ago, I just didn't "get" depression and anxiety.
Some stuff is just a reaction to sick upbringing or unbearable circumstances, it's not all a 'hardware problem'.

Quote
I understood the concept (that they were mental illnesses), but could get, at a gut level, why people couldn't just snap out of it. I always thought if people just stopped focusing on the negative and tried to see the positive, then they could overcome it somehow — and it would never happen to me, because I knew how to just look past the bad times and forward to the good.
The funny thing for me is that therapy concepts which focus on what helps you ("positive") are much more effective on PTSD in my experience than analytic ones which focus on what goes wrong and why ("negative"). But it's not just 'think positive'...(that's like telling school kids to concentrate...) it's more like retraining the brain, learning visualization exercises which create inner safe places etc. to get out of traumatic-flashback-anxiety-loops and stay calm in trigger situations before you get drawn into it. The problem with PTSD is that confrontational stuff (going through it all again) doesn't help much, but just drives you into another loop along with the accompanying symptoms... And since it's based on traumatic memories you can't simply earase the memories themselves with some drug... It's more like learning how to press the right buttons and stop short circuits before you fry when some ignorant presses the wrong buttons.

Quote
Then I had about eight straight months of obsessive, intrusive and occasionally pretty disturbing thoughts (I've had intrusive thoughts before, but never obsessive for more than a day or two, and usually only for a couple hours until I found a distraction; my OCD had until lately always been mild except when I was stressed by stuff like finals, and very behavioral), leading to some major anxiety and mild but still life-altering depression, and now I get it. And I am really, really glad I'd never vocalized those thoughts* (except with friends, in the "What can we do to help cheer you up?" sort of way) because I have been getting it from people and it's really frustrating and just makes it even worse. Sad
I hope you're feeling better. Smiley
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« Reply #56: March 24, 2010, 08:35:25 pm »

And I am really, really glad I'd never vocalized those thoughts* (except with friends, in the "What can we do to help cheer you up?" sort of way) because I have been getting it from people and it's really frustrating and just makes it even worse. Sad

Sorry, didn't mean to write a novel.
It was a good novel, though - I was thinking as I caught up on the thread about the "magical thinking" aspect of victim-blaming, and I was really glad to see it covered (and very well; I appreciated you extending it to so many of the other ways it manifests).

I have to say (as someone who's been dealing with chronic depression since childhood) that I'll take "What can we do to help cheer you up?" (asks the person what they'd find helpful rather than just doing something that might not be helpful and could exacerbate; recognizes that "help" is all friends can give) over just saying, "Cheer up!" any day of the week.  What being told to cheer up conveys to me is, this person doesn't care about my issues, they just want me to make 'em go away for their comfort and convenience; someone who asks me what they can do to help is showing real caring and concern, and a willingness to be involved with me depression and all - the latter doesn't change the place I'm in when I'm depressed, but it can make it easier to be there.

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« Reply #57: March 24, 2010, 08:37:35 pm »

I wanted the shove the guy's crystal collection up his ass.
One at a time, sideways, and with the points positioned for maximum discomfort.

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« Reply #58: March 25, 2010, 03:52:29 am »

I have to say (as someone who's been dealing with chronic depression since childhood) that I'll take "What can we do to help cheer you up?" (asks the person what they'd find helpful rather than just doing something that might not be helpful and could exacerbate; recognizes that "help" is all friends can give) over just saying, "Cheer up!" any day of the week.  What being told to cheer up conveys to me is, this person doesn't care about my issues, they just want me to make 'em go away for their comfort and convenience; someone who asks me what they can do to help is showing real caring and concern, and a willingness to be involved with me depression and all - the latter doesn't change the place I'm in when I'm depressed, but it can make it easier to be there.
That's exactky the way I experience commands like "just think positive" too.

I just realized "What can we do to help?" is also very nice because they don't force their idea of help onto you, they ask what kind of help you'd like. The other thing I hate is: "Let us help you, you don't know what you need, but we do...."
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« Reply #59: March 07, 2011, 01:05:54 am »



I have been diagnosed with PTSD, Major Depression, Schitzoaffective disorder, and Bipolar 2 (AKA recurrent depression). People generally don't want to discuss these disorders. I have hallucinations, severe physical pain, many memory problems, slurred speech, double vision, tremors, and other symptoms. All because I can't "Snap out of it"

Anyone here have any similiar issues?

Keilia

Myself, I have been diagnosed with PTSD from childhood trauma, Major Depressive Disorder, General Anxiety Disorder, and fast cycling Bipolar.  Top all that off with Fibromyalgia, degernative joint disease, and asthma....and I'm far too much of a mess to be only 35.  LOL.
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