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Author Topic: Worst Recipe Ever!  (Read 12371 times)
dragonfly_high
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« Reply #15: July 28, 2009, 08:26:43 am »

How awful!  This is like an old 50s cookbook I have featuring a weiner crown.

Sperran

Weiner crown?Huh
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« Reply #16: July 28, 2009, 09:34:27 am »

Weiner crown?Huh

Imagine a shape like a rack of lamb, formed with pastry and weiners standing on their ends.

Sperran
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Star
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« Reply #17: July 28, 2009, 09:44:18 am »

Imagine a shape like a rack of lamb, formed with pastry and weiners standing on their ends.

I...  was horribly afraid that was what you meant.  I was scared to ask.  That sounds, er, um...  interesting?  But not necessarily in a good way.  I'll just make regular old pigs-in-blankets if I want hot dogs and pastry, thanks.  Which I usually don't, anyway.
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dragonfly_high
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« Reply #18: July 28, 2009, 10:51:53 am »

Imagine a shape like a rack of lamb, formed with pastry and weiners standing on their ends.

Sperran

Sad I agree with Star, that was what I was afraid you meant.  Man, it's amazing the things people come up with. 
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« Reply #19: July 28, 2009, 09:52:06 pm »

Weiner crown?Huh

Reminds me of the hot dog octopus tool.
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« Reply #20: July 28, 2009, 10:27:39 pm »

Reminds me of the hot dog octopus tool.

I have seen those octodogs. They're sort of eerie looking.
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« Reply #21: July 31, 2009, 09:41:25 pm »

The thread title explains it all.

What is the worse recipe you came across?  Did it sound good before you tried it?  If so, then did you figure out what went wrong?  Did you manage to fix the recipe and managed to make something good out of it?


By far *the worst* recipe I've ever cooked was one for Honey Cake from Sara Snow.
( http://www.sarasnow.com/images/recipes/dessert/honey_cake.html )

I didn't have internet at the time, and as a 17-year-old getting ready for her first year-and-a-day handfasting (We fell in love at 15, I'm almost 21, and we're still together) I was desperately seeking a recipe for a Honey Cake or a nice yellow cake I could soak with some honey.

Well, it just so happened, about a week before he showed up, that I was watching the food network and this (new at the time) lady came on with a recipe for a "healthy, delicious, natural," Honey Cake.

So, I scribbled down the recipe and got the ingredients.

The cake was DENSE, disgusting, and tasted like arts & crafts paste.  UGH! Worst recipe EVER!

And I followed the instructions to a T! And my stepmom was RATHER pissy that the cake she had spent so much on ingredients for, was so disgusting.

I found the recipe for you all as well, in the above link.
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« Reply #22: August 08, 2009, 12:58:21 pm »

The thread title explains it all.

What is the worse recipe you came across?  Did it sound good before you tried it?  If so, then did you figure out what went wrong?  Did you manage to fix the recipe and managed to make something good out of it?


The worst things that came to mind are:
 1) My mother-in-law's bread sauce. I swear,that stuff is denser than cement and has a life of its own! It just seems to edge closer and closer to you from across the table until you just want to run for the hills screaming....
2) My friend's home made corned beef and onion pie-yes, it really is as bad as it sounds, and
3) The first bread that my daughter made at nursery school for me. You could have sold it to the dwarves for catapult ammunition- no castle would have EVER survived!
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« Reply #23: August 12, 2009, 01:31:24 am »

Reminds me of the hot dog octopus tool.
Octodogs - wow, just f#@%in' wow!  *shaking head to get rid of stinging, burning sensation* wow.

I did screw up Mac&Cheese once.  When I was 12, I added the cheese sauce before I drained the water off the noodles.  I about had a melt-down that I had screwed it all up... Mom fixed it, don't remember how though.  Shouldn't have tossed the box with directions before I was done...  Cheesy
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« Reply #24: August 12, 2009, 03:36:44 pm »

The thread title explains it all.

How did I miss this thread?

My most hated:  that gag-inducing green bean/mushroom soup casserole that's everywhere in the States during the fall/winter holidays.  Why won't it leave me alone?!

Brina
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« Reply #25: August 12, 2009, 03:48:16 pm »

How did I miss this thread?

My most hated:  that gag-inducing green bean/mushroom soup casserole that's everywhere in the States during the fall/winter holidays.  Why won't it leave me alone?!

Brina

I'll second that for the standard recipe.  However, I make a related dish from scratch that is too good for words.  It requires, however, that you use fresh green beans, fresh mushrooms, duxelles, bechamel, freshly made french fried onions and none of the packaged stuff. 

It isn't slimy, over-salted, full of preservatives and totally devoid of nutrition.  It's actually really damned good.
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« Reply #26: August 12, 2009, 07:12:05 pm »

The thread title explains it all.



I can only really think of two horrible failures.  One was fish stew.  Barf.  I don't know what it was about it, but it was just really bad.  Like, "the chickens won't even eat this" bad.

The other was when I tried to get creative with the cranberry sauce and ended up with this dish that was totally un-eatable.  I should have known when the recipe called for VINEGAR in a CRANBERRY dish that it couldn't be good.  I've since found a nice recipe with ground cranberries and nuts and orange...and no vinegar...that's really good and a little different from the traditional stuff.
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yewberry
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« Reply #27: August 12, 2009, 08:29:41 pm »

I'll second that for the standard recipe.  However, I make a related dish from scratch that is too good for words.

I think we can safely say those are two completely different critters.  You can tell because only one of them is foodWink

Brina
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Dark Midnight
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« Reply #28: August 26, 2009, 04:23:47 am »

How did I miss this thread?

My most hated:  that gag-inducing green bean/mushroom soup casserole that's everywhere in the States during the fall/winter holidays.  Why won't it leave me alone?!

Brina

Ok, you guys win- I don't think that the English have anything quite as inventively gross as you all seem to!
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« Reply #29: August 26, 2009, 10:08:00 am »

Ok, you guys win- I don't think that the English have anything quite as inventively gross as you all seem to!

Oh, sure you do.  But it mostly stems from the English habit of boiling everything quite to death. 

Shall I offer some examples that will make most people in America wince?  Steak and kidney pie will do nicely to start.  I seriously can't eat it.  The whole "It is kidneys." bit ruins it for me right off.

Those mushy peas.  I don't get it.  They're delightful little legumes, all sweet and fresh and green and delicious and you boil the poor dears until they're not much more than puree held together in their own skins. 

Now, growing up in a family that is terribly Canadian-Irish, I also eat a few things that make my family now wince.  Colcannon can cause half the family to revolt and go out for dinner.  Poutine has much the same effect.  I find them both comforting foods in the cold months.  Mashed potatoes with leeks and cabbage and way too much butter...  fries with brown gravy and cheese....  Mmmmmmmmmmmmm.... 

Most of the vile recipes out there aren't really vile.  It's about cultural conditioning- The English and Irish are both known to boil every decent veg they get their hands on to death, Americans use too much salt and processed foods, Thai food is consistently too hot for many people and they toss peanuts in far too many things (personal gripe of mine, as I'm allergic and I have to watch like a hawk if I eat Thai at a restaurant not to end up getting them in my food).  French food is too rich, Asian cooking has too much soy and msg for many people...  And there are, in every cuisine, dishes that are done to death.

Go to any American picnic and you'll find too many potato salads and macaroni salads.  In the '60s and '70s there were too many Jell-O salads, too.  Holidays in the US brings out the green bean casserole and the scalloped corn.  At St. Patrick's you can count on corned beef, cabbage, potatoes, carrots and onions all boiled to oblivion in every Irish-American household.  American Independence Day brings on the bbq season, and there will be far too much meat, scads of corn on the cob and the aforementioned salads. 

I'm sure there's a dish or two in England that is done to death.  That dish that, if you didn't see it at every get together, isn't really that bad, but because you are sick of it, and it is everywhere you go during the holidays, becomes vile by dint of simple over-exposure? 
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