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Author Topic: Request for healing prayers and energy  (Read 16803 times)
Aster Breo
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« Topic Start: May 02, 2007, 01:39:30 am »

Now that I'm starting to feel a little better I realize that it didn't occur to me to post in this thread to ask for help with this awful depression.  I can't believe I didn't think of it.

I've been struggling with a nearly crippling depression for the last couple of weeks, triggered by a job loss and some family issues.  It's all covered in other threads, so no need to rehash here.  (And, yes, I'm pursuing medical treatment.)

I think the suicidal part of the program has passed now, but I'm still up and down.  More up than down, but the downs are still bad at times.  So, if you can spare a few prayers or some healing energies, I'd really appreciate it.

I'm putting myself on the Cill list, too.   Wink

Thanks!!
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« Reply #1: May 02, 2007, 02:14:04 am »

So, if you can spare a few prayers or some healing energies, I'd really appreciate it.

Of course I will.  Smiley

{{{{Moon Ivy}}}}

Is it ok that I share your name with my best friend in Safrica so he can add you to his prayer list, too?
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« Reply #2: May 02, 2007, 06:57:15 am »

Now that I'm starting to feel a little better I realize that it didn't occur to me to post in this thread to ask for help with this awful depression.  I can't believe I didn't think of it.



::hugs::

I understand about the depression.  I have been fighting depression all my life, but it worsened this last year.  Especially when I see what my illness has done to Alan.  I have told Alan I wished they had just let me die.  One day I was so far gone I was counting my pain pills and wondering how many it would take....

We have attacked this on several fronts....

Darn....puppy wants out.  I will return....
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« Reply #3: May 02, 2007, 07:05:56 am »

Now that I'm starting to feel a little better I realize that it didn't occur to me to post in this thread to ask for help with this awful depression.  I can't believe I didn't think of it.

I've been struggling with a nearly crippling depression for the last couple of weeks, triggered by a job loss and some family issues.  It's all covered in other threads, so no need to rehash here.  (And, yes, I'm pursuing medical treatment.)

I think the suicidal part of the program has passed now, but I'm still up and down.  More up than down, but the downs are still bad at times.  So, if you can spare a few prayers or some healing energies, I'd really appreciate it.

I'm putting myself on the Cill list, too.   Wink

Thanks!!

{{{{{Moon Ivy}}}}}

Depression SUCKS.  I've been wandering through it myself lately.

Of course you have my support.  May you find your way through to the other side.
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« Reply #4: May 02, 2007, 07:32:57 am »



We have attacked this on several fronts....

Darn....puppy wants out.  I will return....

And here I be. ::grin::

I take drugs.  They keep me from becoming hysterial at the least thing.

I have someone to talk to -- my best friend, Alan.

I draw on postive energy -- no matter where I find.

I do something -- it doesn't matter what.  I consider it a good day if I achieve something.

I remind myself of a basic truth -- I want to live most of the time and there are quite a few people who wish me to remain for a time.

And I just got a puppy that was rescued and she needs me and she is alive and warm and loving.

Any of those help you?

Elspeth Sapphire
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« Reply #5: May 02, 2007, 08:09:54 am »

Now that I'm starting to feel a little better I realize that it didn't occur to me to post in this thread to ask for help with this awful depression.  I can't believe I didn't think of it.

You are and will be in my prayers.
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« Reply #6: May 02, 2007, 08:21:12 am »

Now that I'm starting to feel a little better I realize that it didn't occur to me to post in this thread to ask for help with this awful depression.  I can't believe I didn't think of it.

Thanks!!

{{{Moon Ivy}}}

Hang in there. Of course, you'll be in my thoughts and prayers.
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« Reply #7: May 02, 2007, 09:07:43 am »

Request granted Moon Ivy.  Things will get better. 

You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Brightest Blessings in love and light.  Kiss 
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« Reply #8: May 02, 2007, 11:04:43 am »

Now that I'm starting to feel a little better I realize that it didn't occur to me to post in this thread to ask for help with this awful depression.  I can't believe I didn't think of it.

{{{{Moon Ivy}}}}
as has already been said, depression sucks - hang in there, and remember, you have us - in spirit if not in body Smiley
Wish I'd had you guys three years ago.
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« Reply #9: May 02, 2007, 12:49:22 pm »

Now that I'm starting to feel a little better I realize that it didn't occur to me to post in this thread to ask for help with this awful depression.  I can't believe I didn't think of it.

I've been struggling with a nearly crippling depression for the last couple of weeks, triggered by a job loss and some family issues.  It's all covered in other threads, so no need to rehash here.  (And, yes, I'm pursuing medical treatment.)

I think the suicidal part of the program has passed now, but I'm still up and down.  More up than down, but the downs are still bad at times.  So, if you can spare a few prayers or some healing energies, I'd really appreciate it.

I'm putting myself on the Cill list, too.   Wink

Thanks!!

(((((Moon Ivy)))))

You're in my thoughts and prayers. Depression sucks!
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Aster Breo
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« Reply #10: May 02, 2007, 01:39:22 pm »

Is it ok that I share your name with my best friend in Safrica so he can add you to his prayer list, too?

Yes, thank you.
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Aster Breo
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« Reply #11: May 02, 2007, 01:40:52 pm »

Any of those help you?

Yes.  I think of my kids.  I guess they're my puppy dog.   Wink
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« Reply #12: May 02, 2007, 07:36:49 pm »

So, if you can spare a few prayers or some healing energies, I'd really appreciate it.

Of course.  You've been in my thoughts and prayers already, and here's more hugs!  {{{Moon Ivy}}}  I know how hard this has been for you--you'll make it through, I know it!
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« Reply #13: May 02, 2007, 10:09:22 pm »

Yes.  I think of my kids.  I guess they're my puppy dog.   Wink

::nod::

my daughter when she was little kept me going.

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Aster Breo
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« Reply #14: May 03, 2007, 03:25:10 pm »


Well, I've had something of a revelation about my recent and continuing depression saga and I thought I'd share it with you all, since you've been so kind with the outpouring of support.

I've been on this forum long enough that you probably know that this is unusual behavior for me.  I've never had more than a passing problem with depression -- the kind of "down in the dumps" everyone gets.  To be literally suicidal several times in a two week period is so far out of my normal zone that, in my lucid periods, I figured there's just GOTTA be something causing it.

So I took a really hard look at what's happening it my life.  Yes, I just had a hysterectomy.  Yes, I lost my job and haven't found another yet.  And, yes, both of those things are big.  But until two weeks ago I was coping with them OK.  What changed?

Answer:  Medicine.  My doctor put me on Topamax to treat migraines.  I'd been on it for a few weeks, but it requires a slow increase to get to the appropriate levels, and I'd just about reached that level a couple of weeks ago.  I was on this drug several years ago with no similar problem, so it didn't occur to me to think about depression as a side effect.  But I went online last night, and sure enough, depression is listed.  And I found several websites and blogs of people who had very similar experiences as mine:  sudden and severe onset of depression and suicidal thoughts -- and in people who, like me, had no history of clinical depression.

Unfortunately, I can't just stop Topamax cold turkey, as doing so causes a risk of seizures.  I have to taper off just as gradually as I tapered on.  But at least I know what's going on now, and when those horrible, cold feelings hit, maybe I can fight them a little better now.  Plus, there's an end in sight.

So, thank you all for the healing and prayers you've been sending.  I credit you with giving me the inspiration and strength to figure this out.  I think I might have just given up if you all hadn't been throwing all those hugs and candles and energies at me.

Please keep it coming a little while longer.  It's going to take me about a month to get off of this evil drug.  I figure the last two weeks were the worst, so the next two weeks are likely to be pretty bad, as well, since I'll have nearly as much of the drug in me.  After that the levels will be going down faster.

And my motto for the next month will be:

Debilitating migraines:  They're better than suicide.
« Last Edit: May 03, 2007, 03:32:37 pm by Moon Ivy, Reason: left out an \"of\" » Logged

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